logo
episode-header-image
Jun 2024
1h 2m

Untangled: Suffering & The 8-Fold Path w...

iHeartPodcasts
About this episode

If you look at social media with its reliance on meme-based psychology, you’d think that the Buddhist approach to life is to not let things get to you - that the true spiritual path helps you rise above such limited, unenlightened human feelings like grief, greed, and resentment. 

 

This week on It’s OK, Zen teacher Koshin Paley Ellison is here to tell you that your suffering deserves your attention. 

 

In this episode we cover: 

 

- How an experience of targeted violence shaped Koshin’s childhood, and what it’s taught him about the suffering of others

- Why it’s healthier to spend time in the “life is suffering” part of the 4 Noble Truths, rather than rushing to the other 3 as solutions

- How to work with the pain and the suffering in your own life, so that it doesn't fester and cause more harm

- Why going to the furniture store looking for milk is only going to lead to disappointment

- Koshin’s new book, Untangled: Walking the Eightfold Path to Clarity, Courage, and Compassion

 

We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2022.

 

Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.

 

About our guest:

Sensei Koshin Paley Ellison is an author, Zen teacher, and Jungian psychotherapist who has devoted his life to the study and application of psychotherapy and Buddhism. Koshin co-founded the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care, with his husband Chodo Robert Campbell, to transform the culture of care through contemplative practice by meeting illness, aging, and death with compassion and wisdom.

Koshin’s work has been featured in The New York Times, PBS, and CBS Sunday Morning among other media outlets. His newest book is Untangled: Walking the Eightfold Path to Clarity, Courage, and Compassion. Find him on IG @koshinpaleyellison

 

About Megan: 

Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today’s leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief

 

Additional Resources:

Chodo and Koshin joined us in season one of It’s Ok that You’re Not OK. Listen to that episode here

 

Learn about the New York Zen Center’s contemplative care program at zencare.org

 

Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here

 

Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed

 

Books and resources may contain affiliate links.

Follow our show on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and TikTok @refugeingrief and @itsokpod on TikTok.

For more information, including clinical training and consulting and to share your thoughts, visit us at refugeingrief.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Up next
Jul 2024
Protecting Your Mental Health in the Healthcare Workplace, with the Burned Out Burnout Expert, Dr. Jessi Gold
We know that healthcare workers are burned out and exhausted. Provider mental health is a huge issue… but are the institutions listening?  This week on It’s OK, burnout expert Dr. Jessi Gold talks to us about (obviously) burnout, but also ways HCW* can start to change the workpla ... Show More
37m 29s
Jun 2024
Over and Over Again: Illustrator Aubrey Hirsch on the Power of Storytelling
The world is such a hot mess: every day a new disaster, a new human rights catastrophe. It can just feel… endless. Illustrator Aubrey Hirsch joins us to talk about outrage and trauma and community building - it’s like the greatest hits of modern culture. But mostly, she joins us ... Show More
39m 19s
Jun 2024
Other People Have It Worse: Veteran Jason Kander on PTSD & Recognizing You Need Help
On the outside, veteran Jason Kander had everything going for him: successful political career, lovely family, the respect of his peers. But on the inside, he was struggling: nightmares, depression and suicidal thoughts were constant companions. Jason joins us to talk about his n ... Show More
1h 12m
Recommended Episodes
May 2024
Healing From Complex PTSD with Stephanie Foo
307. Healing From Complex PTSD with Stephanie Foo Abby, Amanda and Glennon are joined by author and radio producer, Stephanie Foo. They discuss Stephanie’s memoir, What My Bones Know, and her journey healing from Complex PTSD.  Discover: -The difference between Trauma, PTSD and c ... Show More
1h 9m
Dec 2024
Welcome to The Ask Dr Jodi Show!
Are you ready to breathe a sigh of relief? Hi, I’m Dr. Jodi, and on Ask Dr. Jodi, I’m here to help you feel better, really better. I bring trauma-informed mental health and relationship advice to make sure you know: your brain isn’t broken, and your feelings aren’t wrong. Whateve ... Show More
2m 23s
Dec 2024
Working with Your Parts: Complex PTSD, Dissociation, and Hypervigilance with Elizabeth Ferreira
Somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins the show to discuss complex trauma, dissociation, and working with challenging emotions. Forrest and Elizabeth start by exploring the relationship between Internal Family Systems and somatic therapy, including how we can apply a somatic ... Show More
1h 21m
Jan 2025
Imposter Syndrome & Comparison Culture: Ditch Self Doubt and Boost Confidence with Deborah Conquest
Hi everyone, and welcome to another episode of Ask Dr. Jodi! Tonight, I have the privilege of sitting down with my dear friend and vocal coach extraordinaire, Deborah Conquest, to unpack the topic of imposter syndrome. If you’ve ever felt like a fraud, doubted your abilities, or ... Show More
38m 39s
Dec 2024
Is It Trauma And ADHD? With Britt Frank
In this conversation, host Monique Koven and trauma therapist and author Britt Frank explore the intricate relationship between ADHD and trauma, emphasizing the importance of self-compassion and the role of diagnosis in mental health. They discuss personal experiences, the challe ... Show More
28m 31s
Apr 28
Heal Your Trauma, Anxiety, and Stress Through Your Body with Somatic Practitioner Brittany Piper
We are so glad to welcome back Brittany Piper – speaker, author, Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, and educator in sexual violence prevention and trauma recovery. In this episode, she is sharing her expertise of somatic healing, which starts with the body and can be life-changin ... Show More
1h 45m
Apr 14
Ep 293 The Hidden Cost of Surviving
Why does it feel like no matter how hard you try, you're still stuck in survival mode? Why do you lash out at the people you love, then feel terrible about it afterward? Why does intimacy feel impossible—even though all you want is a deep connection? If you're asking yourself the ... Show More
31m 51s
Oct 2024
Forces Of Nature: A Conversation On Childhood Trauma with Gina Demillo Wagner
In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus ... Show More
24m 2s
Nov 2024
Permission To Grieve With J.S. Park
In this episode of the Healing Trauma Podcast, Guest Host, Trauma therapist Dr. Mark McNear interviews JS Park, a hospital chaplain and author about the complexities of grief and trauma. They discuss the role of a chaplain as a 'grief catcher,' the importance of allowing ... Show More
41m 55s
Mar 2025
Why You Feel Lost in Life: Dr. Gabor Maté on Trauma & How to Heal
If you feel lost or stuck in life, today’s episode will help you understand the root cause of trauma and how childhood experiences shape you throughout your life. Understanding your trauma is the key to healing. Your past doesn’t define you—but it does shape you. And today, world ... Show More
1h 17m