logo
episode-header-image
Feb 2024
36m 5s

166. Fantasy bonding - is it love or del...

iHeartPodcasts
About this episode

Sometimes we become more attached to the idea of someone and their potential, than the reality of who they actually are. We begin to project our wants and desires on to them and ignore the red flags, the disappointments, the truth. This is what we call fantasy bonding and it prevents us from seeing someone for who they truly are, causes us to be lead along and invest in the wrong people. In this episode, we break down the psychology of fantasy bonding, including: 

  • The origins of fantasy bonding in childhood
  • How a fantasy bond emerges 
  • Relationship intensity and attachment
  • Why our fear of loneliness drives us into the wrong relationships
  • The idealisation of our partners 
  • What happens when the fantasy fades 
  • How to avoid a fantasy bond 

Listen now. 

Follow us on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

 

 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Up next
Aug 21
324. Why do we hold grudges?
Why do some things sit heavy in our chest for weeks, months, even years - while others seem to slide right off? In today’s episode, we’re unpacking the psychology of resentment, exploring why letting go can feel so hard, and what our grudges might actually be trying to tell us ab ... Show More
39m 32s
Aug 19
323. The power of breathwork
Breath work, as a therapeutic technique, is having it's day in the sun. You may be seeing videos about it cropping up everywhere, but the truth is that it's a very ancient and deeply powerful psychological practice... when done correctly. In today's episode we are joined by our e ... Show More
47m 35s
Aug 15
322. How to feel like yourself again
Let's be real...too many of us are struggling with a sense of disconnect between who we are in our daily lives and our true selves. We feel like we no longer do the things that set our souls on fire, we have lost what makes us unique, we are bored, we are stagnant, maybe we don't ... Show More
42 m
Recommended Episodes
Mar 2024
2111: Are You in an Unhealthy Relationship? by The PsychAlive Team on Genuine Emotional Connection
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.Episode 2111:The PsychAlive Team explores the murky waters of unhealthy relationships, pinpointing the subtle signs that indicate a ... Show More
10m 22s
Jan 2024
2039: Why Break Ups Hurt So Much by Dr. Lisa Firestone of Psych Alive on Emotional Loss & Genuine Intimacy
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.Episode 2039:Dr. Lisa Firestone's article "Why Break Ups Hurt So Much" on Psych Alive.org delves into the deep emotional impact of r ... Show More
11m 20s
Dec 2018
178: What's Your Fantasy?
Sexual fantasy can play a large role in a relationship and individual sexuality. However, there's often a fair amount of shame around sexuality and sexual fantasies. Listen to today's show to learn how to explore your own fantasies and share them with your partner. You just might ... Show More
50m 14s
Feb 2023
Episode 168: How To Bring Your Sexual Fantasies To Life
There’s a pretty big gap between fantasy and reality. In my own research, I've found that about 80% of adults say they have a fantasy they'd like to act out at some point, but just about 20% have ever done so before. I've also found that only about half of adults say they’ve ever ... Show More
25m 8s
Jan 2024
Ep. 112: Exploring Your Sexual Fantasies
Sexual fantasies are something many people don't even discuss with their own partner. Why is there so much embarrassment around sex especially when it comes to fantasies? Are  sexual fantasies normal? Can they hurt your relationship? How many people actually have sexual fant ... Show More
4m 52s
Aug 2023
Once Porn Was The Only Culprit, Now A New Fantasy Reeks Havoc On Relationships
We are still on vacation so please enjoy one of our favorite past episodes. On this episode we talk about fantasy: erotic fantasy worlds that men create in their minds inspired by scrolling social media. It's not about an addiction to porn, it's something else. A whole new world ... Show More
48m 41s
Jun 2023
Episode 201: What We Fantasize About, And How To Share Your Fantasies
Let's talk about sexual fantasies! In today's show, we’re going to explore what people fantasize about doing sexually—and how that varies around the world. So how does culture influence what we fantasize about? We’re also going to discuss how people feel about their fantasies, wh ... Show More
35m 6s
May 2021
#14: When love hurts: Are you in a Trauma Bond?
Is love supposed to hurt? Is it normal to feel emotionally attached to a person who hurts you, keeps making empty promises to change,  and yet you find yourself staying anyway? In today's episode, we're talking about trauma bonds and why it's not actually "love", b ... Show More
21m 21s
Dec 2021
What’s Your Sexual Fantasy?
So you’ve got a sex fantasy...and you’re ready for it to become reality. That’s great! But let me be the first to tell you: this process is part art, part science. The art? That’s your erotic self. Closing your eyes, imagining hot -- possibly taboo -- scenarios, and taking the ti ... Show More
30m 28s
Mar 2024
The Lover’s Chains: Whispers of the slave’s heart
In this episode, I explore the archetype of the 'Lover' in BDSM relationships. While the word 'Lover' often conjures up images of passion and romance, in BDSM, it encompasses so much more: empathy, connection, innocent energy, vulnerability, and ego. But the Lover archetype isn’t ... Show More
19m 28s