logo
episode-header-image
Oct 2024
44m 35s

238. High functioning codependency and c...

iHeartPodcasts
About this episode

What is the cost of caring too much for others? Always being the person to fix everyone's problems? Never needing anyone, but secretly loving that everyone else relies on you? Well, it turns out it can cost you and your relationships a lot, and may also be a sign of high functioning codependency. High functioning codependency is much more common amongst people who are overachieving, overgiving and who have few boundaries (even if they don't know it). 

In today's episode, we are joined by the originator of this term. Terri Cole is a psychotherapist and boundary expert who has been investigating this phenomena for years in her high functioning and highly successful clients. She shares the traits, behaviours, costs and ways to improve your high functioning codependency. This was one of my favourite episodes to date, happy listening!

Buy Terri's new book here:  https://www.soundstrue.com/products/too-much?srsltid=AfmBOor1-0MHrQayS-ZdUANvTC5qC-T4e1Bpxotu8cti1CqOVVizKO17 

Follow Terri here: @terricole 

Terri's resources: https://www.terricole.com/ 

Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg

Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast

For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Up next
Nov 21
356. How to survive a breakup in your 20s
<p>Going through a breakup is always going to be devastating. Heartbreak is one of the most gut-wrenching human experiences: it affects our brain, our body, our routines, our identity, and our sense of the future. Why does it hurt so much, and how do we actually get through it?</ ... Show More
46 m
Nov 18
355. Why don't I enjoy sex that much?
<p>Our 20s are sold to us as the decade of peak desire - full of passion, spontaneity, and effortless intimacy. But for so many of us, that isn&rsquo;t the reality. When libido dips or fluctuates, it can feel confusing, isolating, and even shameful. In this episode, we ask why it ... Show More
34m 29s
Nov 16
354. How to break a toxic habit
<p>We all have habits we wish we could change - patterns we repeat even when we know they&rsquo;re hurting us. So why is it so hard to stop? In this episode, we explore the psychology behind toxic habits. How they form, why they become automatic, and what they&rsquo;re actually d ... Show More
34m 41s
Recommended Episodes
Feb 2025
Understanding Codependency: Are You Too Invested in Others?
Do you often feel exhausted, resentful, or underappreciated in your relationships? In this episode, Gabe Howard and licensed psychotherapist Terri Cole explore the complexities of codependency, including its less-talked-about form: “high functioning codependency.” Terri shares pr ... Show More
28m 27s
Sep 2024
Breaking Free of High Functioning CoDependency with Terri Cole
When you hear the word "codependent," you might think of the traditional enabler framework involving a hapless victim and their selfless rescuer. Psychotherapist and boundary expert Terri Cole certainly did. However after years in her therapy practice, she realized that many of h ... Show More
46m 17s
Apr 2025
Are You A High Functioning Codependent? Find Out with Terri Cole
402. Are You A High Functioning Codependent? Find Out with Terri Cole. Amanda, Glennon, and Abby are joined by licensed psychotherapist and relationship expert, Terri Cole, to talk about high-functioning codependency—a term Terri coined to describe those who appear highly capab ... Show More
52m 14s
Oct 2024
High-Functioning Codependency: From Managing to Loving with Terri Cole
<p>What would your reaction be if someone asked if you’re codependent? If “Certainly not!” is your immediate response, this episode invites you to look a little deeper. While we often turn to a single definition of codependency—enabling another person in a situation that is damag ... Show More
55m 37s
Dec 2024
Terri Cole: Stop Trying to Fix Everyone. Signs You’re a High-Functioning Codependent and How to Break the Cycle
What does it really mean to help someone, and where do we draw the line? In this episode of A Really Good Cry, I sit down with the incredible Terri Cole, a psychotherapist whose own life experiences offer a profound look into the world of high-functioning codependency. Terri shar ... Show More
1h 16m
Oct 2024
Breaking Down High-Functioning Codependency with Psychotherapist Terri Cole
<p>If you've ever felt like you're doing too much for everyone else (or even just one person) at the expense of yourself, this episode will speak to your soul. We're talking about high-functioning codependency with psychotherapist and author Terri Cole. She explains high-function ... Show More
1h 32m
Nov 2024
How BPD Turns Work into a Stressful Nightmare: Real Stories Revealed!
<p>Ever felt overwhelmed at work? You're not alone! In this episode, Xannie, Georgette, Melanie, André and Raf discuss the challenges of navigating workplace stress when living with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).</p> <p> Building on our conversation from Wednesday’s episo ... Show More
12m 3s
Oct 2024
Stop Doing Too Much & Reclaim Your Peace with Terri Cole
Terri Cole explores how traditional codependency definitions fail to capture the experiences of many high-achieving individuals. Terri introduces the concept of high-functioning codependency, shedding light on behaviors like over-responsibility for others' problems and the result ... Show More
52m 19s
Nov 2022
The BPD Bunch: Ep 2 - Unstable Relationships
<p>In this Episode, Xannie, Alex, Lore, Jay, Mo and Solène talk about the second of 9 symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder listed in the DSM-5: A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships</p> <p>The Bunch share their experiences with the symptom to give y ... Show More
52m 39s
Oct 2024
481: Healing Codependency In Relationships
Codependency can feel difficult to navigate whether it's you or your partner displaying codependent behaviors. Listen to today's show for valuable tips and insights into dealing with the difficult emotions codependency can cause and start learning how to heal today! In this episo ... Show More
40m 51s