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Dec 2024
1h 16m

Terri Cole: Stop Trying to Fix Everyone....

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About this episode

What does it really mean to help someone, and where do we draw the line?

In this episode of A Really Good Cry, I sit down with the incredible Terri Cole, a psychotherapist whose own life experiences offer a profound look into the world of high-functioning codependency. Terri shares an unforgettable story about the night she brought a stranger home from the train station—a gesture that sparks our exploration into the blurred lines between helping and interfering. 

Join us as we delve into the psychological impacts of codependency, discussing how our desires to help can sometimes control both our lives and those around us. Terri provides crucial insights on recognizing when empathy exceeds healthy limits and the vital importance of establishing boundaries for our well-being. 

If you’ve ever found yourself in the role of a rescuer, or if you’re seeking to understand the emotional intricacies of codependency, this heartfelt discussion is not to be missed.

 

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

00:56 Bringing home a stranger

03:13 What is high functioning codependency?

06:02 Signs of an HFC

07:47 The line between helping and controlling

11:14 How to support without overstepping

15:59 The power of asking expansive questions

18:30 The burden of being 'nice'

20:47 Breaking the cycle of auto advice-giving

25:20 Letting someone be their own hero

28:03 Why parents should let kids fail sometimes

39:05 Asking before giving advice

43:20 How projection affects our relationships

46:07 Why asking for help feels so hard

52:26 How to stop tying worth to helping others

58:09 Stop caring what others think

1:02:18 Showing up the same online and offline

1:07:40 The cost of perfectionism

1:12:25 How to truly rest your mind and body

 

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