logo
episode-header-image
Jan 2024
36m 20s

EP 436: What to do When Guilt and Grief ...

CHRISTINE HASSLER
About this episode

This coaching call is about grief and guilt about past choices. Today's caller, Michelle, is doing her best to navigate through the guilt and shame she feels about a decision she made. This is a beautiful conversation that can be triggering for a lot of reasons. Please listen with an open heart, open mind, and compassion. We all can relate on some level to making decisions we regret, or are not proud of, or that we feel shame or guilt around.

 

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode436].

 

With any choice, it is easier to look into the past from where we are now and evaluate the choice and wish we had done something differently. We have an amazing ability to judge and punish ourselves for a decision we made in the past. When truly we were making the best decision we could at the time.

 

If you have shame, guilt, or regret over a choice you made, how is that serving you? What is the guilt doing? How much longer do you want to punish yourself? 

Eventually, we have to let the guilt go and get to forgiveness because unless you have a time machine there is no way to change it. The only thing we can do is move forward.

 

When a person, especially a mother, is taking care of their health and making decisions that are most in alignment with their truth, it benefits their child.

 

Journey to Joy is a free three-day inner child workshop with Christine and Stefanos on February 6th ‒ 8th, 2024. Send an email to jill@christinehassler.com to get more information or go to ChristineHassler.com/joy to sign up.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Have you made a choice that you have shame or guilt about?

  • Are you trying to justify a decision you have made?

  • Is there a part of you that doesn't feel safe and secure? 

  • Can you get out of your head, your beliefs, or your judgments and allow your heart to open to feel what you need to feel?

 

Michelle's Question:

Michelle is asking for guidance on how to release the grief she feels about terminating her pregnancy.

 

Michelle's Key Insights and Ahas:

  • Michelle terminated her unexpected pregnancy last year.

  • She felt she was abandoning her inner child.

  • Her young-woman energy was not ready to have a child.

  • She feels unworthy, unsafe, and insecure.

  • She wants one day to step into motherhood but wants to release her grief first.

  • She knows the pregnancy came into her life for a reason.

  • She knows she made the best decision for her.

  • She's been trying to connect with the soul because she didn't during her pregnancy.

  • She was not ready to be a mother.

  • She knows she is worthy but finds it difficult to embody it.

  • She wants to let go of things that don't serve her.

 

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • Know that taking care of ourselves is the best thing for our children.

  • It is time to deal with her inner child wound.

  • Grieve without the story and the justification.

  • Ask the child what it was there to teach her.

  • Create safety and security for herself.

  • Check out Byron Katie's "The Work."

  • She is worthy of love.

  • Trust her decisions.

  • Join the Journey to Joy inner child workshop.

  • Prepare to consciously conceive with love.

 

Takeaways:

  • Where are you not making self-honoring choices in the name of love?

 

Sponsor:

Caraway Cookware — Caraway products are toxicity-free, beautiful, and easy to clean and use. The cookware and bakeware sets have a chemical-free slick coating. The new stainless steel cookware set is a must-have. To upgrade your kitchenware in style and design, go to CarawayHome.com/Overit for 10% off and use the promo code OVERIT at checkout.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram

@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram

Assist@ChristineHassler.com

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Up next
Nov 22
CC: Storytime with Christine: Two Women at the Well
<div>Welcome to a new storytelling segment from me featuring original fables and teaching stories written to inspire, soften, and reconnect you to the truth of who you are. Story Time speaks to the heart, not the inner critic — bypassing logic and landing directly in the part of ... Show More
11m 15s
Nov 19
EP 520: How Overfunctioning Blocks Love with Nina
<p>In this powerful coaching session, Christine supports Nina, a high-achieving woman who has learned to rely on herself since childhood—and now wonders why love feels so hard to receive. Despite years of healing and success, she finds herself attracting men who are kind but lack ... Show More
28m 47s
Nov 15
CC: Building Deeper Connection Through Authentic Communication with Dr Susan Campbell
<p>In this episode, I sit down with renowned relationship coach and author <strong>Dr. Susan Campbell</strong> for a real, practical conversation about communication, connection, and what it takes to create emotionally honest relationships.</p> <p>We talk about the most common pa ... Show More
43m 56s
Recommended Episodes
Apr 2024
Parenting: How to Nurture Yourself and Others
299. Parenting: How to Nurture Yourself and Others In this episode we’re going deep into parenting. Glennon, Abby, and Amanda (along with the help of Tracee Ellis Ross, Michelle Obama and Dr. Becky Kennedy) discuss the brutiful journey of parenting, reparenting ourselves, and le ... Show More
1h 4m
Jun 2023
Featured Episode: Why asking for help as a new mom is the BEST decision you could make! — Christen Reed
Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night! At the moment we’re in between seasons here on the show. But while we’re waiting for our next official season to begin, we thought this would be a great time to pull some of our favorite episodes out of the Girls Night archive. This is the p ... Show More
50m 54s
Jan 2024
312: Intrusive Thoughts and COVID with a Newborn with Jackie Werboff, LMHC, PMH-C
The height of the COVID pandemic caused so much fear and anxiety, all for good reason. The moms who gave birth and faced postpartum difficulties during this time were under immense pressure to try to keep themselves and their babies safe.  For many, it ended up being the perfect ... Show More
47m 5s
Feb 2021
No More Yelling! How Courtney Transformed her Parenting
<p>Today I’m joined by Courtney, a lovely mother of three young boys who recently completed my One on One Six Week Course. In this episode, she tells us how she has begun to transform her family, let go of yelling, and found more calm for her and her boys.</p><p>If you think you ... Show More
27m 46s
Dec 2023
#125 How To Heal & Let Go Of Trauma: Ella Mccrystal
**TRIGGER WARNING: This podcast mentions s*xual abuse, r*pe and su1cide** This week I sit down with Psychotherapist, Clinical Hypnotherapist, EMDR CERT and Business Coach Ella Mccrystal who opens up about her journey and how she has transformed the lives of so many. We discuss ... Show More
1h 19m
May 2024
Managing Mom Guilt as a Working Mom
<p>Do you know mom guilt – the uninvited guest who overstays her welcome, has no boundaries, and drives you freaking crazy?</p><p>This week on the Mama Work It podcast, I’m diving deep into ways to minimize that mom guilt in your life, however you might be feeling it. Tune in to ... Show More
22m 4s
Mar 2021
How Can We Help Our Kids Through Difficult Moments Without Fixing with Guest Jenna
<p>Sometimes when our child is having a hard time of course we want to fix things, help</p> <p>them see the bright side. But things might look arduous and difficult for our children and leaning into those upsets with empathy can help them feel seen, heard and understood. This way ... Show More
26m 35s
Dec 2023
Can We Control Our Kids? - Oren Jay Sofer [433]
What happens when a meditation teacher gets frustrated with his toddler? Hunter talks to Oren J. Sofer, meditation teacher and author of the new book, “Your Heart Was Made For This,” about his life with a toddler as well as how we can cultivate qualities like courage, patience, e ... Show More
53m 12s