logo
episode-header-image
Aug 2018
1h 3m

716: 8 Tips to Keep the Conversation Goi...

THE ART OF CHARM
About this episode

How do you take a conversation to the next level and create real connection? In this episode of The Art of Charm podcast, AJ and Johnny explain 8 fundamental steps to develop a relationship beyond just a brief interaction with a stranger on the train, scoring a number at a bar, or a handshake at a business conference. Learn the social cues, the mental tricks, and the right body language to tee up a compelling conversation.

The 8 Steps

Take from the following article - 8 Insanely Effective Ways to Connect with Anyone You Meet

1. PAY ATTENTION - It’s simple but so easy to overlook.

*What are a few ways for you to lock into a conversation?

2. SEEK FEEDBACK - From trusted friends to tell you the truth on what you can improve on.

*Can you think of someone who you can talk to about this? Call them tonight!

3. ASK QUESTIONS - What’s everyone’s favorite topic? Encourage people to talk about themselves and share their experiences with you to create understanding.

*How can you show someone your genuine interest in who they are?

4. REMEMBER YOUR NAME - What’s the best way to remember someone’s name and how can you use these tools during your next night out?

5. DON’T PRETEND YOU KNOW EVERYTHING - It’s the biggest turn-off of them all!

*In fact, what’s one of the best ways to create a seamless and empathetic connection to turn someone one and create a connect?

6. CARE ABOUT OTHERS about others! Show appreciation for the people around you and let that bleed over into all areas of your life.

*How can you create grateful positivity to spread over into your environment?

7. SEE A ROOM FULL OF FRIENDS - Visualize that at your next outing — treat no one like a stranger.

*What’s one of the reactions that we have by becoming uncomfortable in a new environment?

**REMEMBER: This takes practice! If you expect everyone to treat you like a friend, you might set too high of an expectation, so take it in stride.

8. CONNECT IN PERSON. As much as we might want to, we can’t truly connect online! But it’s easy to be afraid of the risk and rejection of meeting in person.

*In what ways can you pivot your body language to show true interest to someone you’re meeting in person?

This was a big episode, but don’t get overwhelmed! Focus on finding that one genuine friend and go from there. And remember: Humans are naturally bad at active listening, so don’t beat yourself up if you find yourself struggling along the way.

Through these podcasts, we strive to give you daily hacks for your life that you can use to overcome the whims of your primitive mind and truly connect with the people around you!

Check out our bootcamp page to learn about the Art of Charm’s personal training!

The Art of Charm Bootcamp

Resources

Articles from this episode!

8 Insanely Effective Ways to Connect with Anyone You Meet - “Lifehack”

How to Make Friends, According to Science - “The Atlantic”

Keep up with The Art of Charm

Want to RUN A HALF MARATHON in your Halloween costume with AJ and Johnny in LA? Register now!

Enjoying what you hear? Your reviews are essential to us and for those who haven’t discovered The Art of Charm podcast yet. Click here to share your Art of Charm experience.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Up next
Today
From Likable to Influential: The 3C Method [Social Intelligence Brief]
Do people like you… but never seem to respect you? In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak reveal the hidden social trap of being “too agreeable.” While it might seem like the best way to build rapport, research shows that excessive agreeableness ac ... Show More
17m 46s
Jul 7
Your Brain Needs More Space, Not More Hacks | Dr. Anne-Laure Le Cunff
Can being "too smart" actually hold you back socially? In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak sit down with Anne-Laure Le Cunff—founder of Ness Labs and a former Googler turned neuroscience researcher—to explore the psychology of overthinking, soci ... Show More
1h 4m
Jul 4
Supercharge Your Charisma [Social Intelligence Brief]
If you’ve ever felt invisible in a room full of people, it’s not your personality—it’s your presence. In this episode of Social Intelligence, AJ and John unpack the three research-backed traits that make people charismatic, memorable, and magnetic—whether you're an introvert or n ... Show More
20m 12s
Recommended Episodes
Jul 2019
(#104) What Successful People ACTUALLY Talk About
Over the last few months I have been traveling the US and spending a lot of my time with 7 and 8 figure earners. Some people I met for the first time and some were long time friends I was catching up with, but there was one thing that particularly stood out to me. I realized that ... Show More
23m 1s
Feb 2024
Improvisation Implementation
Hear it Here - http://bit.ly/improvking00:02:51 Conversation Equals Improv00:09:03 Emotional Intelligence00:12:19 Play 00:19:53 Takeaways Does your mind blank in conversation and create awkward silence? Do you run out of things to say and struggle to keep dialogue flowing?(A) Con ... Show More
22m 11s
Feb 2024
Turning On The Charm
Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home00:03:25 Why Stories Matter00:05:23 Four Elements of a Good Story00:09:28 Be Natural ... But Have a Plan00:17:16 USING WITTY BANTER IN BUILDING RAPPORT00:22:35 Technique 2: U ... Show More
31m 2s
Sep 2023
7+ Powerful Habits To Avoid Loneliness, Feel Connected And Build Authentic Community
Ever find yourself yearning for a deeper bond with those around you?   Creating deeper connections doesn't have to be an exhausting or daunting task. We can still create connections in the simplest most ordinary ways if we make time for it and show sincerity.  From the hustle and ... Show More
33m 17s
Mar 2023
How to Speak Up for Yourself: Simple Strategies for Being Heard
In this episode, you’re learning how to speak up for yourself and make sure that you are heard. Whether you want to be more influential and visible at work or there’s a hard conversation that you’ve been avoiding with a family member, this episode will empower you to have a break ... Show More
56m 57s
Jan 2023
6 Ways to Be a Great Friend & Build Meaningful Relationships in 2023
Today, I am going to share with you different ways to strengthen your friendships. Becoming a good friend requires several key qualities such as trustworthiness, loyalty, and communication. Building relationships is always a pursuit in life, and learning how to strengthen every f ... Show More
24m 57s
Apr 2024
Have Lasting Conversations: The Rule of 3 & Threading Magic!
Feeling awkward in conversations? Don't worry, charm isn't about you - it's about making others feel heard!00:00:00 Hello listeners00:01:28 Talk WITH people and not TO them00:17:18 Sustain Conversations with Conversational Threading and Useful AcronymsThis video dives into Chapte ... Show More
30m 7s
Sep 2021
8 Principles of Communication to Improve Your Relationship and Become a Better Problem Solver
“I hear you. I understand that this is difficult for you. What can I do to help?” These are the words we desperately want to hear when things don’t work out in our life. We expect our partners to be there for us, to understand what we are feeling and why we are feeling these emot ... Show More
29m 17s
Aug 2023
Ep. 79 - Cultivating Assertive Communication
In this week’s episode, Barb and Michelle discuss the art of assertive communication, and how we all can cultivate the skills needed to communicate in this way. Plus, they share their own personal experiences being afraid to be assertive for fears of not being liked, and more! Fo ... Show More
1h 2m
Jun 2024
462: How To Have Better Conversations
Opening up to vulnerability, asking better questions and mindfulness are all tools to have better conversations and improve your relationships. Listen to today's show for actionable tips to engage with your partner, friends and family in deeper conversations. In this episode with ... Show More
36m 16s