logo
episode-header-image
Sep 2021
16 m

How To Stop Needing So Much Reassurance ...

Jessica Da Silva, LMFT
About this episode
Do you feel as though you constantly need validation, reassurance or connection with your partner? If so, this episode is for you! Learn where you learned these ways of relating, how it plays out in your relationships and steps to becoming more secure! ——— Free Attachment Style Quiz: www.jessicadasilvacoaching.com Instagram: @thejessicadasilva Tiktok: @jess ... Show More
Up next
Oct 4
Passive vs. Rigid Anxious Attacher: Two Faces of Anxious Attachment
Not all anxious attachers look the same. In this episode, I explore the Passive Anxious Attacher, who protects against loss by shrinking back, and the Rigid Anxious Attacher, who holds on tightly to feel secure. You’ll learn how to tell the difference, why both stem from the same ... Show More
17m 46s
Sep 28
Passive vs. Rigid Avoidant Attacher: Two Faces of Avoidant Attachment
Not all avoidants look the same. In this episode, I break down the two common ways avoidant attachment shows up in relationships: the Passive Avoidant, who protects themselves by shrinking back, and the Rigid Avoidant, who protects themselves through control and high standards. Y ... Show More
17m 56s
Sep 5
What Does Relationship Compatibility Really Mean?
In this episode of Let’s Talk Attachments, we dive into what compatibility in relationships really means—and why it matters so much more than chemistry alone. I’ll break down how to recognize true alignment in core values, lifestyle choices, emotional needs, and long-term goals, ... Show More
29m 10s
Recommended Episodes
Dec 2024
"How do I support my AVOIDANT partner in opening up?"
You long for more emotional intimacy in your relationship but your partner avoids deeper conversations? This is where we talk about what you can do to support your partner feeling safe! ❤️ Listen to the AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT EPISODE HERE ❤️ Listen to the ANXIOUS ATTACHMENT EPISODE ... Show More
51m 43s
Apr 2024
#19 - Attachment Theory: Insecure Attachment Styles (Part 2 of 4)
Can two people with an insecure attachment style ACTUALLY be together? How do the insecure attachment styles differ? What were the seminal studies that helped us to understand more about attachment theory? Do we need to 'fix' our attachment style? All these questions answered and ... Show More
32m 51s
Aug 2024
#85 - How to Help Someone w/ Relationship Anxiety + ROCD
If you are the partner of someone with relationship anxiety, this episode is for you.   If you have relationship anxiety and want to be able to ask your partner for more intentional support, this episode is for you!   Thank you to the help of the You Love and You Learn community ... Show More
31m 16s
Jul 22
#198: What Anxiously Attached People Need to Thrive in a Relationship
When you have an anxious attachment style, it can be hard to know what you actually need to feel secure — especially if past relationships have left you second-guessing yourself or trying to manage your anxiety by suppressing your needs.In this episode, we’re exploring five key i ... Show More
21m 59s
Jul 23
Emotional Availability - How to develop it & recognise it others!
In this episode, we’re diving into the essential but sometimes elusive topic of emotional availability. What does it actually mean to be emotionally available and how can you tell if someone else is?We’ll explore what emotional availability looks and feels like, why it can feel s ... Show More
41m 9s
Jun 2025
"Am I being unreasonable?" - Realistic & Unrealistic Expectations in Dating & Relationships
In this episode, we dive into one of the most confusing and emotionally charged questions in relationships: “Am I asking for too much?”Whether you’ve felt guilty for needing more closeness, unsure about asking for more emotional connection, or confused when to expect what in dati ... Show More
1 h
May 2022
Insecure in Love: Exploring Attachment Styles
What is your attachment style and how does it affect how you view yourself and behave within a relationship? Before listening to the episode take the online quiz to determine your personal attachment style (free link below). Whether you realize you have a secure or insecure attac ... Show More
42m 34s
Apr 2025
Stop Auditioning for Relationships — Start Connecting
You’ve been showing up in your relationships like you’re auditioning—afraid to take up space, afraid to be too much, and desperate to be chosen. But real love doesn’t ask you to perform—it asks you to be real. In this video, we’ll unpack the roots of performance-based connection, ... Show More
8m 57s
Jun 2025
Rewriting Limiting Beliefs - The KEY to Developing Secure Attachment
The core difference between people with insecure attachment and those who are securely attached isn’t just behavior - it’s what they believe. About themselves. About others. And about love. In this episode, we explore how your beliefs silently shape your relational behaviour & ho ... Show More
34m 20s