Mike Elliott joins me for a conversation about the silent struggle many men carry inside relationships: the gap between looking successful from the outside and actually feeling present, safe and connected on the inside. Mike is a Relational Leadership Mentor and Men’s Initiation Guide whose work is rooted in his own lived journey through adoption, abandonment, addiction, relationship breakdown, men’s work and relational healing.
We explore what happens when a man learns to survive through performance. The career can work. The money can come. The house can be built. The body can become strong. And still, underneath it all, there can be a fear of being left, a belief that something is wrong, or a nervous system that does not yet know how to remain open when intimacy gets uncomfortable.
Those with ears, let them hear.
Always love,
Ryan
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Connect with Mike ElliottOfficial website: https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/
The Initiated Man: https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/
TIMInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mikeelliott.relating/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Itsmikeelliott
The Sacred We on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/7EqHPtL9DovzPtazag8QO1
The Sacred We on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-sacred-we/id1676808681
Couples work with Mike & Courtney: https://www.thesacredwe.com/2-2-container-details
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Connect with Always Better Than Yesterday
Website: https://abty.co.uk/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alwaysbetterthanyesterdayuk/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/abty/
Men’s Group – Akira: https://abty.co.uk/akira
Join our mailing list: https://abty.co.uk/contact
Sign up for coaching: https://abty.co.uk/coaching
Email: podcast@abty.co.uk
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Episode chapters
00:00 – The silent struggle of men in relationships
04:25 – Built it and almost lost it
06:51 – Mike’s story: abandonment, survival and collapse
16:00 – What healing presence actually feels like
18:18 – Three levels of relational consciousness
22:38 – Radical responsibility and sacred relationship
26:14 – Father wounds, re-fathering and brotherhood
32:50 – A new definition of male leadership
34:10 – Prayer, partnership and choosing differently
39:17 – The relationship as a report card for presence
46:09 – From individual heroism to ‘we’ work
47:46 – The lion: strong back, soft front
51:03 – The Initiated Man and working with Mike
52:42 – Ryan’s abandonment pattern and practising staying
54:38 – Heartprint, legacy and the final invitation
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Description: Mike Elliott, Relational Leadership Mentor and Men’s Initiation Guide, joins Ryan Hartley to explore why high-performing men can still feel disconnected in love. Discover The Initiated Man, Relational Authority™, men’s work, emotional presence, brotherhood, attachment patterns and the practice of becoming a stronger, safer and more connected man.
Disclaimer: This episode discusses trauma, attachment, nervous-system regulation, relationships and emotional wellbeing through personal experience and coaching perspectives. It is for education and reflection and is not a substitute for medical, psychological or therapeutic care.
#MikeElliott #menswork #mensmentalhealth