Welcome to a series of videos that will introduce you to a simple model of men’s psychology that draws on some of the growing body of research on men.
There’s more than meets the eye with men, just as there is with women. Men are driven at the core by instincts the same as women—masculine instincts.
However, just like women, they have emotions of very similar types and style. The expression is different because emoting is in some part, governed by the instincts.
Finally, the intellect and mature executive functions are also just like those of women (we have identical IQ potential - and “EQ” potential.) Yet the masculine instincts also influence that, and our communication and behavior.
This synthesis of the old and new, the rigorous and the elegant, and most important of all, an attempt at “unification of the psychologies” is the aim of Masculine Psychology, as we start to discuss in this first video.
It’s Masculine Psychology (originally, MMP), which is available in videos delivered one day at a time, for the full 5+ hours of the course (available to paid subscribers only)…
Upgraded Members get full access to the full program and many others from Men’s Psychology right away without waiting for lesson-by-lesson:
SUMMARY:
Dr. Paul addresses how to handle conflict with overpowering individuals—particularly those who exhibit immaturity and aggression—drawing on analogies and practical strategies. Key points include:
1. **Handling Aggression**: The speaker compares dealing with an aggressive person to disarming a child with a loaded gun. They suggest using distraction techniques to diffuse tension, such as redirecting the person's focus toward a common issue or task, which can prevent direct confrontation.
2. **Using Distraction as a Tool**: In a workplace scenario, the speaker recommends highlighting problems (like poor performance metrics) as a way to engage the aggressive individual in a cooperative discussion rather than escalating the conflict. This approach serves to redirect their energy and attention positively.
3. **Sword and Shield Metaphor**: The speaker elaborates on conflict management strategies by comparing fighting with a sword (aggression) versus using a shield (defensive, boundary-setting approach). They emphasize that while engaging in battle can be exhausting, maintaining boundaries and saying "no" can tire out an aggressor, limiting damage during conflicts and conserving energy.
4. **Assertiveness and Boundaries**: By continuously asserting boundaries—saying "no" or using more assertive apologies (referred to as "sorry, number two")—the individual can protect themselves from unnecessary conflicts until the right moment to respond is available.
5. **Addressing Harassment**: The speaker briefly shares a personal anecdote about a man facing sexual harassment at work, underscoring the importance of communicating about such issues. The man felt isolated and ashamed to seek help, highlighting the need for open dialogue about harassment, regardless of gender.
Overall, the discussion focuses on the importance of effective conflict resolution strategies through distraction and boundary setting, allowing individuals to manage aggressive behaviors without escalating tensions unnecessarily.