logo
episode-header-image
Jan 2025
57m 14s

Solo Episode: When he loves you, but can...

Anna Kai
About this episode

Don't do as Bernie Madoff did (ie. commit history's largest Ponzi scheme), but you can learn from why he was able to do what he did. This week, I'm discussing why sometimes, gaslighting yourself into believing you're capable of something well before you actually do it can be a self-fulfilling prophecy that snowballs into others believing in you, too. If you've ever written yourself off, tune into this episode and hear the stories that inspired me to create possibility where I once found impossibility. I answer your voicemails on why you're still feeling heartbroken after a breakup even when the rest of your life is getting better, and what to do when he says he still loves you, but just can't be with you.


Leave me a voicemail: speakpipe.com/brutallyannapodcast


Follow Anna: 

https://www.instagram.com/maybeboth/

https://www.tiktok.com/@maybeboth

https://www.youtube.com/@maybeboth

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Up next
Nov 14
How to Know When to Quit (And When to Keep Going)
This week, I’m closing the chapter on Brutally Anna by talking about mile 20—of the New York City Marathon, yes, but also of life. I ran that race back in 2017, and the thing about a marathon is you always know how far you have left. In life, you don’t. And this year felt like mi ... Show More
17m 47s
Nov 7
The Myth of the Soulmate
In today’s episode, I’m talking about why I think the word “soulmate” is kind of bullshit—not because love isn’t real, but because we use that word to trap ourselves in relationships that aren’t actually right for us. I share how I once assigned the title “soulmate” to practicall ... Show More
25m 20s
Oct 31
Laziness as a Love Language
This week’s episode is about how I think I accidentally found the cure for doom-scrolling: doing nothing—on purpose. Lately I’ve been trying to detach from my phone because I realized that constant productivity and comparison are killing my joy. Somewhere along the way, “rest” go ... Show More
22m 27s
Recommended Episodes
Mar 2025
Ep. 282 - Your ex isn't holding you back anymore. THIS is.
<p>In this eye-opening episode, Dorothy challenges you to confront what's actually holding you back long after you've "healed" from your breakup. Discover why so many people who are "over their ex" still find themselves recreating similar patterns and limitations in their new lif ... Show More
20m 28s
May 2023
#59: Ultimate Guide for Heartbreak, Rebuilding & Transforming YOU
<p>If you&#39;re feeling heartbreak, abandonment and relationship loss you&#39;ll want to put this episode on repeat. </p> <p>Heartbreak and Rebuilding starts with YOU, what you&#39;re doing, thinking and saying to yourself not just the man. Relationship struggles, wanting your e ... Show More
32m 46s
Aug 2024
How to Get Over Narcissists, Cheating, and Heartbreak...the RIGHT Way
<p>When you've been betrayed or hurt by someone, you can often ask yourself, "How did I miss the red flags?". And in this reaction you may end up blaming yourself. Especially if you feel like there's a recurring pattern in the people you've chosen to date so far. So what is the r ... Show More
38m 15s
Sep 24
The “Ex Effect”: Why Your Brain Can’t Let Them Go
Do you feel stuck on an ex . . . convinced you’ll never feel that way again? In this week’s episode, Matthew, Audrey, and Stephen reframe “I’ll never be as happy” as an anxious thought, not a prophecy.They unpack nostalgia traps, why we over-glorify past relationships, and how to ... Show More
1h 2m
Feb 2025
When They Tell You They Can’t Be in a Relationship...
<p>Are you struggling with heartbreak after falling for someone who says they&nbsp;<em>can’t</em>&nbsp;be with you? In this episode, Matthew unpacks what it really means when someone claims they “can’t” be in a relationship. Through the of a woman who gave everything to a man who ... Show More
17m 59s
Aug 2024
My Honest Advice to Someone Scared Of Dating Again | Matt Monday
<p>Maybe this will sound familiar: After a few bad dating experiences, you say to yourself, “My life is pretty awesome as it is, so why do I even want someone else disturbing my peace?”</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>The thought of not having to deal with the dating process may feel like a h ... Show More
34m 9s
Jun 2025
Why you can't get over the person you never even dated
<p>Why do situationships hurt more than actual relationships? Because there’s just enough hope to keep you delusional. We’re getting into why they mess with your head, how they keep you stuck, and the wildest stories from our personal archives. Like the guy who “ordered” Chloe a ... Show More
35m 52s
Apr 2025
Ep. 285 - The hidden freedom in letting go: Why we cling to people who don't choose us
In this episode, I reveal the counterintuitive truth about why letting go feels impossible (even when holding on is blocking everything you want), and the unexpected place where freedom is actually hiding. If you've been feeling like you know exactly what you need to do to move o ... Show More
17m 16s
Nov 3
Ep. 313 - I wasted so much time with my ex
If you've been stuck replaying the thought, "I wasted so many years on my ex," this episode is going to blow your mind. Dorothy breaks down why those years weren't lost, they were the reason your life is about to move faster, clearer, and bigger than ever before. You'll learn how ... Show More
16m 35s
Sep 9
When Overthinking Is Your Relationship Coping Mechanism (and why it’s not a Solution)
<p class="p1">Do you go to overthinking the second the vibes are off?</p> <p class="p1">Scroll TikTok for answers before the text even delivers?</p> <p class="p1">Google “anxious attachment + texting” like it’s your part-time job? Yeah. Me too.</p> <p class="p1">This episode is f ... Show More
22m 10s