logo
episode-header-image
Sep 2024
50m 8s

You 2.0: How To Say No

Hidden Brain, Shankar Vedantam
About this episode
Saying no to someone who asks for something is often easier said than done. Maybe it's a boss who wants you to take on a new assignment. Or your kid's teacher, seeking volunteers for a field trip. Or a friend who asks you to lend her money. How should we respond to these demands on our time, energy, and resources? This week, psychologist Vanessa Patrick expl ... Show More
Up next
Oct 5
When Bad Things Happen to Good People
When historian Kate Bowler was diagnosed with Stage IV cancer, she became fascinated by the ways people try to impose order on events they can't control. She joins us to explore what it means to live fully when life offers no satisfying explanation for the tragedies we may face. ... Show More
1h 32m
Sep 28
How to Make a Difference: Part 2
Think about the last time you had a discouraging thought. Maybe you told yourself, "This won't work. I'm not cut out for this." Did you take that thought as fact? Last week, we talked with psychologist Martin Seligman about why some people come to believe that their actions don’t ... Show More
49m 9s
Sep 21
How to Make a Difference: Part 1
Why do some people act on the possibilities before them, while others come to believe that nothing they do will make a difference? Psychologist Martin Seligman describes his groundbreaking research on learned helplessness, and explains how the stories we tell ourselves about setb ... Show More
48m 10s
Recommended Episodes
Jul 2023
Finally Learn to Say No
When someone asks us to do something we don’t want to do, we often say yes even though we want to say no, because we think that saying no will feel terrible. But my guest, Dr. Vanessa Patrick, says the opposite is true: we actually feel great when we say no.So why do we have such ... Show More
44m 8s
Nov 2022
214 - Friday Fix: 10 Ways to Say No and Stick to It
There’s a lot of information out there about setting healthy boundaries. But sometimes it’s difficult to get to the first step–saying no. If you’re a people-pleaser or you have a fear of missing out, saying no is difficult. Whether your friends invite you to do something or your ... Show More
10m 15s
Dec 2020
165. Saying No
Do you agree to do things you’d prefer not to because you’re worried it would be rude or uncomfortable to refuse? Whether you take on extra obligations at work or make subtle concessions at home to “keep the peace,” your discomfort with saying no is likely impacting every area of ... Show More
29m 25s
Aug 2023
S28 E1: Why Do You Say “Yes” When You Want to Say “No”? (Vanessa Patrick)
Too often, we say "yes" to friends, bosses, and even strangers when what we really want to say is "absolutely not." Why do we do this? Vanessa Patrick, a marketing professor at the University of Houston, has spent years researching this question. The answer she's come up with cou ... Show More
15m 56s
Sep 2025
How to say NO without guilt at work I The Psychology of Approval-Seeking
You say yes to another task. Even though your plate is already full. You stay late, again. You avoid pushing back, just in case it makes you seem less committed.In this episode, Martin Wolf and Dr. Verena Seibert-Giller unpack the psychology behind our struggle to say “no” at wor ... Show More
15m 42s
Aug 2023
S28 E5: How To Say No To Pushy Askers (Vanessa Patrick)
In the final installment of her interview, Vanessa Patrick ("The Power of Saying No") gives us tips for turning down the pushy people in our lives. 
14m 10s
Nov 2024
98. For You: Saying No.
<p>Babies…why is it so hard to say no? Jess and Caroline are going to break it down. First up, saying no to an old friend who you don’t vibe with anymore. Second, how to say no to your mom when she’s pushing religion on you. Third, how to say no to…yourself. They talk dynamics, t ... Show More
1h 23m
Aug 2021
7 Steps On How To Say NO, Stop People Pleasing & Prioritize Yourself
Perhaps the hardest word you can say to someone is NO. Saying YES to something, even if it’s half-heartedly meant, is easier because you aren’t obliged to justify it. The pressure is less, and so it’s easier to say so. Whereas, if you say NO, there is this need to justify why you ... Show More
33m 33s
Sep 2021
Just. Say. No.
We know we know! If it was that easy, we’d all have the boundaries of a state in lockdown. Too soon? The point is, we’re not very good at saying no. Or, we say no to the wrong things. We’re here to tell you a secret. You have the answers to this problem. You’re already “in the kn ... Show More
4m 33s
May 2025
How to say no (from WorkLife with Adam Grant)
In a world filled with requests, many of us are struggling to stay afloat. Even if you’re not a people-pleaser, the desire to maintain a positive reputation can make it hard to turn others down. In this episode, Adam explores the art and science of delivering an effective “no.” H ... Show More
36m 11s
Listen to millions of songs and podcasts on Anghami