logo
episode-header-image
About this episode

In today’s episode, Dr. Aziz takes you on a deep dive into how to transform your identity to unlock greater confidence. He reveals that confidence isn’t something you’re born with—it's a skill you can develop. By understanding and reshaping your identity, you can break free from old patterns and create a new, empowered version of yourself.

Dr. Aziz will guide you through what it really means to earn a new identity and why it's crucial for lasting change. You’ll learn how to push past the discomfort of growth and practice the actions that align with the confident, bold person you want to be. This episode is packed with practical insights and a clear action step to help you start building your new identity today.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in who you think you are, this episode will show you how to break free. Tune in and take the first step toward earning a new, more confident version of yourself!

 

------------------

 

What Is Your Identity, and Why Does It Matter?

Your identity is how you see yourself—what you believe about yourself, consciously and unconsciously. It’s the mental structure that determines your actions, decisions, and ultimately, your experiences in life. It includes things like, “Am I smart? Am I attractive? Am I capable?” These beliefs shape how you interact with the world and what you think is possible for you.

But here’s the good news: Your identity is not fixed. It’s not set in stone. You can change it. And by changing it, you can steer your life in a new direction. If you feel stuck in a “fixed identity,” it’s time to break free and create an identity that aligns with the confident, bold, and authentic person you want to be.

"Your identity isn’t fixed—it’s flexible, and you have the power to shape it into something that serves you, not holds you back."

The Power of Earning a New Identity

Changing your identity isn’t just about thinking differently or repeating affirmations. It’s about earning that new identity through action. You don’t become more confident by wishing for it; you become more confident by doing the things that challenge you, that push you beyond your comfort zone.

For example, if your current identity says, “I’m shy” or “I’m not good at talking to people,” you’ll need to start practicing interactions that defy those beliefs. Gradual exposure—taking small, manageable steps toward social confidence—is how you earn that new identity. Whether it’s saying hello to strangers, engaging more in conversations at work, or pushing yourself to be more assertive, every action you take builds your confidence muscle.

Key Point: You Must Earn Your New Identity

You create a new identity by consistently doing things that your old identity says you can’t. This isn’t about overnight transformation; it’s about building the muscle of confidence over time.

From Fixed to Flexible: The Journey of Growth

The biggest mistake people make is believing that who they are now is who they have to be forever. They think their identity is fixed and unchangeable. But that’s not true. Just like learning a new skill—whether it’s playing an instrument or getting better at a sport—you can learn to be more confident. It’s all about practice and persistence.

You’ve likely learned new things before, even if it was something as simple as mastering a game on your phone. So why not apply that same mindset to your social skills and confidence? The discomfort you feel when learning something new is natural. The key is to push through that discomfort and keep going.

"Your identity is as flexible as you allow it to be. Every time you challenge your old beliefs, you’re creating space for a new, more confident you to emerge."

Action Step: Design Your New Identity

Now, let’s put this into action. I want you to take a moment to think about who you want to be 12 months from now. What does that new, confident version of you look like? What have you accomplished? How do you feel about yourself? Write it all down. This is your new identity.

Then, work backward. What actions will help you become that person? Maybe it’s starting conversations more often, taking risks in social settings, or practicing assertiveness. Whatever it is, commit to those actions and start earning your new identity today.

"Your new identity is within reach. Take consistent action, face your fears, and watch yourself transform into the confident, bold person you were always meant to be."

For more tools and guidance on building your confidence, check out my programs at DrAziz.com. Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and know on a deep level that you’re awesome.

Up next
Jul 8
The Hidden Dangers of People Pleasing
Are you caught in the gentle current of people-pleasing? In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz breaks down the hidden dangers of being “too nice”—how it shows up in everyday decisions, subtly steers your life off course, and costs you more than you realize. With rea ... Show More
20m 34s
Jun 24
Confidence Lessons From 2,000 Rejections with Colin Yearwood
In this revealing episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz takes you deep beneath the surface of people-pleasing to uncover the root cause of "nice" behavior—and how to break free from it once and for all. Whether it’s avoiding conflict, constantly agreeing, or feeling guilty ... Show More
47m 28s
Jun 25
Confidence Lessons From 2,000 Rejections
In this empowering episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz sits down with sales expert Colin Yearwood, who helps coaches and entrepreneurs grow their businesses by mastering the skill of sales—without manipulation or pressure. Colin shares his powerful journey from avoiding s ... Show More
48m 4s
Recommended Episodes
Sep 2022
Seeing Identity for What It Is
Our sense of identity is composed of the ideas and emotional states — even the gut reactions — that we identify as who we are. Identity is how we recognize ourselves. It guides the structure of our thoughts, emotions, and visceral responses.Most people don’t spend their lives lea ... Show More
36m 26s
May 14
Becoming Your TRUE Self
Are you really free—or just living out what you learned as a kid? After 20 years in self-development, I’ve found that peace doesn’t come from adding more. In this episode, I’ll show you how to spot the conditioning that's been shaping your life and how to reconnect with your true ... Show More
20m 11s
Mar 2025
The Power of Words: Shaping Your Identity and Confidence - EP11
Rewire Your Self-Talk: The Words That Shape Your Confidence & Reality 🎙️✨Have you ever considered how the words you use impact your confidence, identity, and success? The way you talk to yourself—whether consciously or subconsciously—can either hold you back or empower you to st ... Show More
14m 18s
Nov 2024
How to overcome self-doubt and "Who am I to do this"
"Who am I to do this?" is one of the most common forms of self-doubt we hear, often translated into: Who am I to do this? In today's episode we're going to get into the detail of this self-doubt and imposter syndrome, and look at very practical ways you can overcome the feeling o ... Show More
32m 18s
Feb 2025
219. The 5 Identity Shifts That Transform Your Social Confidence Forever
In this episode, we dive deep into why traditional "practice makes perfect" advice falls short when it comes to social skills, and explore how identity shifts create lasting change in your social confidence. Learn five powerful strategies to transform how you show up in social si ... Show More
19m 21s
May 2
7 Mindset Habits That Changed My Life
What if changing your entire life came down to 7 small habits? In today’s episode, I’m sharing the 7 mindset habits that completely transformed my life—from overcoming fear and perfectionism to taking radical responsibility for my future. These aren’t just tips—they’re the founda ... Show More
19m 25s
Mar 2025
THE POWER OF SELF-AWARENESS TO DRIVE CHANGE
What does it take to truly transform yourself? In this episode of The CHANGE 2025 Podcast, we uncover why SELF-AWARENESS is the cornerstone of personal and professional growth. Together, we’ll explore practical ways to strengthen this essential skill—from seeking honest feedback ... Show More
21m 30s
Mar 2024
The Ripple Effect Of Confidence AudioChapter from The Confidence Formula AudioBook by Patrick King
The Confidence Formula: May Cause: Lower Self-Doubt, Higher Self-Esteem, and Comfort In Your Own Skin (Be Confident and Fearless Book 8) By: Patrick KingHear it Here - https://bit.ly/ConfidenceFormulaKing https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0994VF5XH 00:16:21 Low Confidence Characteristic ... Show More
58m 13s
May 26
Unlocking Personal Empowerment: Creating Change and Building Confidence with Dr Dain Heer
In this transformative episode of The Self Esteem and Confidence Mindset Podcast, I’m joined by international speaker and author Dr. Dain Heer to explore how to reclaim your personal power, break free from limitations, and create real change in your life.Dr. Dain shares profound ... Show More
30m 57s
Apr 24
Stop Being a Victim
Are you unknowingly holding yourself back with a victim mindset? I share how my own victim mentality kept me stuck for years — and how taking full responsibility changed everything. I'll show you how to spot when you're giving away your power, shift your mindset, and finally take ... Show More
17m 45s