logo
episode-header-image
May 2021
25m 33s

Tough Conversations

Essential Communications - Tom Henschel
About this episode

A leader, initially described to his coach as clueless, confronts a hard truth about himself. In the process, he gains a four-step tool to guide him through tough conversations.

Core Concepts in this episode:
To convey a tough message and maintain a positive relationship:
1. Start with a full-stop. Act, don’t RE-act. Identify why this conversation is important.

2. Express intention. Say why you’re having the conversation and what your concerns are.

3. Be clear. Be simple. Identify what you wish were different specifically.

4. Attend to the relationship. At every step, even in the conversation, consider the other person.


Related Archive Categories:
Communication Skills
Management Skills
Relationship Skills

Related Tips & Episodes:
Combating Emotional Hijacks

The Conflict Conversation

A Difficult Conversation

Short Sounds Confident

Smoothing Harsh Edges


Books to boost your skills in tough conversation:

Difficult Conversations

Crucial Conversations

 

The library of all the past episodes is at: https://essentialcomm.com/podcast

Subscribe to the HTML version at: https://essentialcomm.com/subscribe/

Be in touch with Tom at: https://essentialcomm.com/contact/

Thanks to all of you who are in touch and who post reviews. Much gratitude!

See you next month!

Up next
Nov 6
How to Motivate and Inspire
After a leader turns around the performance of one of his direct reports, he and his coach explore how it happened. And how to make it stick. Core ideas in the episode:Workplaces improve when positive feedback is presentOur natural human negative bias is a barrier to giving posit ... Show More
20m 47s
Oct 2
How to Guarantee Psychological Safety
A toxic boss destroys psychological safety on her team. One of her direct reports talks to his coach about how to survive. And how to keep his own team safe. Core ideas in the episode:Don’t take other people’s bad behavior personally.You are not a victim. You have choice.Document ... Show More
22m 44s
Sep 11
How to Supercharge Introversion
Concerned his introversion makes him less effective, a corporate vice president asks for coaching – from an extrovert! Together, the coach and client explore ways to assure his introversion is a strength.Myers Briggs Type Indicator assesses four preferences. One is Introversion a ... Show More
23m 50s
Recommended Episodes
Jan 2019
Hard Conversations
Are you dreading a work discussion? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Leslie John, a professor at Harvard Business School. They talk through what to do when you need to set your boss straight, meet with a direct report who wanted your new job, or hash things o ... Show More
32m 29s
Jan 2015
177: How to Start a Conversation With Anyone, with Mark Sieverkropp
Mark Sieverkropp: How to Start a Conversation With Anyone Mark and I were both featured by Forbes as 25 Professional Networking Experts to Watch in 2015 1. First Impressions last the longest John Corcoran spoke in episode 169 on what we can do to recover from a bad first ... Show More
45m 18s
Jul 2022
Better Conversation Skills
• One useful conversational skill is chunking, where you vary the level of information you get coming back to you. This way, you can reach an agreement, acquire more and correct detail, or even persuade people to move from one plane of thought to another. Chunk up to gain a broad ... Show More
44m 33s
Jun 2024
148. Conviction and Compassion: How to Have Hard Conversations
<p>In our personal and professional lives, some conversations are harder than others. To navigate the difficulties of discussing what matters most, Professor <a href="https://www.fastersmarter.io/guests/irv-grousbeck/">Irv Grousbeck</a> says we need the right balance of convictio ... Show More
31m 8s
May 2024
Reverse Interview: Mastering Difficult Conversations - Lindsay Andrews Interviews Kwame Christian
Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company: https://www.americannegotiationinstitute.com/services/workshops/ In this reverse interview, Lindsay Andrews, host of the Unstuck on You Podcast, interviews Kwame Christian, together, they dive deep into the complexities of masterin ... Show More
38m 36s
Jun 2023
Talk To Anyone Anywhere. Breaking The Ice (Toolbox)
The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month. Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your  dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.c ... Show More
46m 10s
Feb 2022
How to continue a good conversation
I have learnt this conversational skill after making lots of mistakes in conversations. This episode will help you to enhance your conversational skills and ability to continue a good conversation.  When you are having a conversation, never try to prove your point of view just be ... Show More
3m 38s
May 2024
Chatterbox #320 – Connecting through conversation
In this Chatterbox episode, Andrew and Anna are trying out something new – they’re playing a conversation game! The goal of the game is to make deeper conversations, moving beyond small talk. The hosts go through a range of questions, from light-hearted to deep and thought-provok ... Show More
31m 47s
Sep 2023
BEP 401 – Socializing at Work 2: Deepening the Conversation
<p>Learn English for socializing with colleagues in this lesson on how to deepen the conversation.</p> >>> The post <a href="https://www.businessenglishpod.com/2023/09/24/bep-401-socializing-at-work-2-deepening-the-conversation/">BEP 401 – Socializing at Work 2: Deepening the Con ... Show More
20m 51s