logo
episode-header-image
Sep 23
26m 53s

How To Actually Like Talking With People

Dr. Aziz: Social Anxiety And Confidence Expert, Author and Coach
About this episode

Do you ever say, “I just don’t like talking to people,” or “That’s not my scene,” and leave it at that? In this episode, we dig deeper into that resistance—what’s really behind the stories we tell ourselves about not wanting to socialize. Whether it’s shyness, discomfort, or old fear masked as preference, Dr. Aziz unpacks how these beliefs can limit connection, joy, and opportunity. You'll learn how to move through that inner “I don’t wanna” voice, what it takes to build real social confidence (even if you're more introverted), and how to stop shrinking your world out of fear. If you’re ready to drop the excuses, expand your comfort zone, and experience more freedom in social situations, listen now. And if you want to go further, check out the link below to join the Supremely Confident Conversation Master workshop—happening soon.



------------------



"Resistance and fear only have power if you let them control your choices."

Do you dread networking events, parties, or casual social interactions? Maybe you tell yourself, “I’m not the kind of person who does this,” or “It’s just not my scene.” Over time, these stories create a version of yourself that avoids connection, missing friendships, opportunities, and growth.

The good news: talking with people can be enjoyable—and even energizing—once you understand the patterns holding you back.

The Hidden Block: Avoidance and Resistance

Most social anxiety isn’t about the people around you—it’s about your internal response. Resistance, aversion, and fear mask themselves as judgments about the environment or other people. You might think, “Everyone’s superficial, it’s going to be boring, I don’t fit in here,” when really your fear of judgment or rejection is driving the story.

Here’s the truth: naming your discomfort and recognizing it as natural is liberating. You don’t need to eliminate fear—you need to act despite it.

"The truth will set you free, man. When you name your fear, that’s an act of courage."

The Cold Plunge Principle: Embrace Discomfort

Imagine a cold plunge: it feels awful before you step in, but exhilarating afterward. Social interactions work the same way. The initial hesitation is temporary—your mind says “don’t go,” but when you act, you experience confidence, connection, and flow.

Terrible before, awesome after. That’s the reality of human interaction. The more you step into conversations, the easier and more natural they become. Over time, your nervous system rewires old patterns of avoidance.

Steps to Actually Enjoy Talking With People

  1. Notice your fear: Identify what you’re avoiding. Is it judgment, rejection, or uncertainty?

  2. Connect with purpose: Ask yourself, “Why does this interaction matter?” Focus on curiosity, contribution, or connection rather than performing.

  3. Take small actions: Approach one person, start with a greeting, or ask a simple question. Each step builds confidence and reduces avoidance.

You don’t have to become an extrovert. The goal is to feel comfortable in your own skin and engage as yourself. You can enjoy meaningful interactions without forcing charisma or overthinking every word.

"Every time you step forward, whether it’s a hello, a conversation, or attending an event, you reclaim a piece of yourself."

The Invitation

Life is short, and avoidance only fuels regret. Social freedom starts with courage and intentional action. Step into the room, move toward connection, and allow yourself to be fully present. As you practice, the joy of conversation will replace fear and resistance.

"You have the courage to be who you are. Trust it, embrace it, and know on a deep level that you’re awesome."

Up next
Nov 18
Healing The Cause Of Social Anxiety & People Pleasing
<p>In this vulnerable and revealing episode of <em>Shrink for the Shy Guy</em>, Dr. Aziz returns from a life-changing couples workshop with a fresh insight into what <em>really</em> causes social anxiety and people-pleasing and how to heal it from the inside out.</p> <p>Most peop ... Show More
25m 41s
Nov 4
How To Keep Going When You're Discouraged
In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz offers powerful insight into what to do when you feel like giving up. Whether you're trying to build confidence, face your fears, or push through challenges, there are times when progress feels slow and resistance feels overwhel ... Show More
21 m
Oct 28
Boost Confidence And Kill Anxiety At The Same Time
In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz reveals the secret to boosting confidence while dissolving anxiety and it’s not another breathing exercise or mindset hack. It’s a deeper shift in how you see yourself and how you approach life. Most people try to overcome fear ... Show More
22m 4s
Recommended Episodes
Mar 2024
How to Actually Make Friends: Stop Treating Everyone Like Strangers!
Better Small Talk: Talk to Anyone, Avoid Awkwardness, Generate Deep Conversations, and Make Real Friends By Patrick King Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/2Q5CWQM 00:00:00 Initial Impressions00:10:41 Make the First Move00:16:50 Find Similarity00:27:35 Manufacture Connection https:// ... Show More
39m 41s
Nov 2024
How to Overcome Social Anxiety: Simple Tools to Build Your Confidence
Ever walked into a room and felt like everyone’s eyes were on you, every flaw on display? You're not alone! In this episode, we’re diving into what social anxiety really is, where it comes from, and why it affects so many of us. I’m sharing my own journey, my little tips and tric ... Show More
28m 13s
Dec 2023
How's life after social anxiety?
<p><strong>In this episode...</strong> <br /> <br /> Have you ever wondered what life looks like after overcoming social anxiety? Join Seb as he shares his perspective after a decade of being "free" from social anxiety - a journey that's been both challenging and rewarding. Here' ... Show More
7m 36s
Aug 21
Afraid of Being Judged? Here's the Real Reason Why
<p><strong data-start="0" data-end="19">In this episode...<br /></strong></p> <p>Are you afraid of what other people think of you? Worried they'll judge you negatively?</p> <p>You're not alone. In this episode, I share my personal journey with the fear of judgment and how it shap ... Show More
9m 56s
Jan 2025
The Introvert Survival Guide: Master Social Situations, Boost Confidence, & Thrive!
Get 45% off the Magic Mind bundle with with my link: https://www.magicmind.com/ERICJAN00:11:26 Introvert Defined00:15:54 Biological Differences00:18:12 Kinds Of Introverts00:28:42 Self-sabotage, And Why You Stay In Your Comfort Zone00:40:18 The STAR acronym explains four main typ ... Show More
44m 48s
Sep 2024
196. The 10 Most Common Mistakes Shy People Make (and how to fix them)
<p class="MsoNormal" style="vertical-align: middle;"><span style= "font-family: 'Calibri',sans-serif;">Tired of feeling held back by shyness, introversion, or social anxiety? In this episode, we dive deep into the 10 most common mistakes these individuals make and offer practical ... Show More
18m 31s
Aug 15
242. When Social Anxiety Gets You Labeled as "Difficult" at Work
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style= "font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: 'Calibri',sans-serif;"> Are your coworkers misreading you?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style= "font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: 'Calibri',sans-serif;"> <br /> If you' ... Show More
12m 52s
Oct 21
Never Feel Awkward Again: 5 Social Skills That Make You Instantly Confident
Boost your Communication Skills and get the life and job you want🤩⁠https://academy.explearning.co/landing/plans/1495891⁠Do you ever feel awkward in social situations? 🫣You’re not alone — but you can fix that. In this video, I’m sharing my top 5 social smoothness tricks to help ... Show More
10m 6s
Mar 2023
Exercise to boost self esteem today
<p>In this episode...<br /> <br /> Do you beat yourself up because of Social Anxiety?</p> <p>Sebastiaan will guide you on how to be more compassionate toward yourself, and how doing so boosts your self-esteem and reduces Social Anxiety.</p> <p>To learn more about how to stop worr ... Show More
7m 38s
Mar 2025
The Startling Impact of Peer Pressure & Why Shyness Can Be a Plus
Who hasn’t had to wait at a doctor’s office well past the appointment time. It sucks. What is a reasonable amount of time to have to wait? Should you complain to someone? This episode starts with some interesting research that explains what you should do so your doctor knows your ... Show More
49m 6s