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Sep 17
46m 43s

Arielle Estoria on The Human Need for Be...

Alice Draper
About this episode

What if the fear of rejection is actually a fear of being fully seen?


In this poetic and soul-searching episode, author and spoken word artist Arielle Estoria opens up about what it means to grow beyond who the world expects you to be—and how devastating, liberating, and cyclical that journey can be.


Best known for her viral Arielle Estoria poems, her book The Unfolding, and her ability to speak straight to the soul, Arielle shares the deeply personal story behind her own “unfolding.” She discusses the grief of leaving behind old identities, the risk of becoming someone new, and the human need for belonging—especially when you no longer fit the roles that once made you feel loved.


We talk about how her relationship with her husband gave her the courage to question inherited beliefs, why creativity is a core value in her life, and what it means to trade approval for truth. Whether you're in the middle of your own unfolding story or afraid to let go of the identity you’ve outgrown, this conversation is a balm for anyone who's ever felt the sting of having no sense of belonging.


What We Cover:

  • The awakening: What it feels like to outgrow the life that once felt safe

  • How Arielle’s husband became a catalyst for growth and authenticity

  • Grief as part of growth: What we don’t talk about when we talk about becoming

  • Letting go of people, labels, and spaces that no longer reflect who you are

  • Why creativity as a value is about healing, not performance

  • The cost of honesty: Losing gigs, friends, and familiarity—and choosing truth anyway

  • What it means to rewrite your “too much” narrative

  • How her book The Unfolding and her album The Art of Unfolding were created for her own healing first

  • The one Arielle Estoria quote every creator needs to hear

  • How rejection became redirection—and why the work always finds who it’s meant for

  • Using art to create belonging, not applause

  • Why even non-artists can use creativity for healing


Quotes That Hit Hard:

💬 "I’d rather have friends who love me whole than love me half."
💬 "That’s the old story. Now, what’s the new one?"
💬 "Creativity is not about sounding good—it’s about speaking soul to soul."
💬 "Rejection isn’t a dead end. Sometimes, it’s a reroute to yourself."


Chapters:


00:00 – Intro
01:30 – Awakening vs autopilot living
04:45 – How her husband gave her permission to explore
08:30 – The grief of growing and letting go
12:00 – Rejection, community loss, and spiritual dissonance
15:10 – Redefining self-worth and belonging
18:20 – How Arielle Estoria poems became a healing practice
22:45 – Why her writing isn’t for the ears—but for the soul
26:10 – Her response to low book sales and how she redefined success
30:45 – Can anyone access healing through art? (Yes.)
35:00 – The raw vulnerability of publishing your truth
40:00 – What rejection taught her about audience, ego, and trust
43:00 – Rewriting the unfolding story in real time


Resources:

  • 📚 Arielle Estoria books: The Unfolding

  • 🎧 The Art of Unfolding – Spoken word album (Spotify, Apple Music, etc.)

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