In this short and powerful replay, ADHD coach, creator, and author Meredith Carder explains why masking happens, what ADHD masking symptoms look like, and how to make strategic choices about when to mask and when to unmask. Many people with ADHD mask their symptoms (at work, with friends, or in public) to fit in and avoid judgment. But masking comes at a cost, and for some, it can lead to ADHD masking burnout.
Meredith shares practical ADHD masking examples and her “low-reward masking” approach for reducing the energy drain of constant self-monitoring. We also talk about finding masking accommodations that help you function without burning out, and how community can ease ADHD friendship struggles, ADHD friendship issues, and help you build genuine ADHD friendship groups.
The conversation then shifts to ADHD rejection sensitive dysphoria (also called ADHD rejection sensitivity disorder), including what’s happening in the brain during perceived rejection, why rejection sensitive dysphoria in ADHD women can feel especially intense, and how emotional regulation and ADHD are connected. Meredith shares tools for increasing rejection tolerance, the role of executive functioning in ADHD women, and how to apply these strategies in daily life.
If you’ve ever looked up an ADHD masking questionnaire, searched for ways to prevent burnout, or wondered how to deal with RSD in a relationship, this episode will give you practical insights and compassionate perspective.
What You’ll Learn in This Episode
The risks of constant masking and signs of ADHD masking burnout
How to identify ADHD masking symptoms in yourself
Real-life ADHD masking examples that can actually help
Meredith’s “low-reward masking” approach to conserving energy
How to find masking accommodations that support your needs
Navigating ADHD friendship struggles, ADHD friendship issues, and building ADHD friendship groups
Understanding ADHD rejection sensitive dysphoria and ADHD rejection sensitivity disorder
Why rejection sensitive dysphoria in ADHD women can feel different
Tools for emotional regulation and ADHD
The connection between executive functioning in ADHD women and rejection tolerance
How to deal with RSD in a relationship and practical steps to reduce its impact
Links & Resources
Follow Meredith Carder on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hummingbird_adhd/
Chapters:
01:33 The dangers of masking
03:35 How masking can be beneficial
04:10 Meredith’s “low-reward masking” approach
06:30 Finding masking accommodations
07:35 ADHD friendship struggles and friendship groups
09:06 Understanding ADHD rejection sensitive dysphoria
11:31 What’s happening in the brain during perceived rejection
12:46 Emotional regulation and ADHD
14:10 Executive functioning in ADHD women and cognitive inflexibility
16:07 Why self-awareness matters for managing RSD
18:33 How to deal with RSD in a relationship and improve rejection tolerance
20:30 Lifestyle factors that increase emotional resilience