logo
episode-header-image
Apr 2024
27m 2s

Who’s to Blame? Determining Your Part in...

Aaron & Jocelyn Freeman
About this episode

Who's to blame for your frustrating problems and patterns in your relationship?

It's obviously your partner, right... they're the problem. No… blaming them doesn't get you anywhere, in fact it makes things worse and more difficult to get out of. 

If there's one thing that is inarguable in social psychology it's that relationships are bi-directional.Meaning, your attitude, actions, and choices affect your partner's attitude, actions, and choices, and vice versa.

Unfortunately many couples stay stuck in frustrating cycles or without a solution because they aren't in a problem-solving state. If you truly operate as a team and dive a little deeper into WHY you keep encountering this frustrating pattern, you can overcome it together.

 

In this episode you’ll hear a deep-dive into:

  • The 5 root causes of most marriage problems/issues

  • 4 self-reflective questions to ask yourself to identify your partner in the situation 

  • Understanding more about a psychology approach to effective problem solving

 

Use this link to join the mentioned Rebuilding Us 30-Day Couples Challenge (level 2). 

Or for other resources, link on our general website link. 

Up next
Jul 8
Stop Tip-Toeing Around Each Other’s Triggers (How to Create Real Emotional Safety in Marriage): Episode 404
You don’t just marry your partner’s strengths—you marry their triggers too. If you’ve found yourself walking on eggshells to avoid setting them off… or shutting down because you feel like you’re too much… you’re not alone. But let’s be clear: tip-toeing isn’t emotional maturity—i ... Show More
29m 20s
Jul 1
What Marriage Challenges Are 'Normal' and What’s Not Okay: Episode 403
Just because something is common in marriage doesn’t mean it’s healthy. We’ve heard countless couples ask: “Is this just a hard season… or is something actually wrong?” “Are we still okay, even though this feels hard?” In this episode, we unpack those questions using anonymous su ... Show More
48m 23s
Jun 26
Your Brain’s Default Settings Could Be Sabotaging Your Marriage (How Neuroscience Reveals Your Blocks) with John Assaraf: Episode 402
Why is it so hard to change the way we show up in marriage, even when we know what we want to do differently? In this special episode, we sit down with John Assaraf, a renowned global leader in success and performance coaching, decades-long behavioral neuroscience researcher, and ... Show More
49m 57s
Recommended Episodes
May 2021
#244 - Dealing With a Withdrawn Partner: Communication Problems, Part 3
What to do when your partner shuts down. Are you trying to have a relationship with a partner who avoids, defends or worse... won't talk at all? Few things are as frustrating, or as hurtful. It's hard NOT to get upset and angry when you're feeling rejected, unloved, or uncared fo ... Show More
42m 28s
Aug 2021
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP BETTER?
So often in relationships we are quick to focus our unhappiness on our partner. It’s their fault things don’t get better, right? It’s way too easy to blame others & not look at ourselves. This episode takes a look at what YOU can do, whether or not your partner is interested in i ... Show More
49m 33s
Jan 2023
I Don’t Usually Share Advice Like This: 6 Lessons on Making Any Relationship Work
In this episode, I’m getting brutally honest with you about relationships.  Our conversation begins with a question from a listener who asked me for advice on how to make your relationship go the distance in this messy modern world. I’ve always shied away from giving relationship ... Show More
56m 39s
Sep 2019
216: Reconnecting and Dealing with Impossible Relationship Moments
Do you ever feel disconnected from your partner? Well, don't worry — at one point, all relationships will face various levels of disconnect. Listen to today's show to learn how to reconnect with your partner, and get through what might feel like an impossible relationship moment. ... Show More
55m 53s
Apr 2021
179. QA: Relationships
Do you tend to make rejection mean there’s something “wrong” with you? Have you ever wondered how to know when a relationship is “toxic”? Do you struggle with a partner who is more extroverted than you are? In today’s Listener Q&A episode, I’ll answer some of your most burning re ... Show More
31m 4s
Jan 2021
76: Is Your Anxiety Sabotaging Your Relationships?
Have you ever felt insecure about something that’s happened with your partner and got yourself worked up in your mind? I have. Many times. And when this has happened to me I know I’ve not brought up the issue in a productive way. In fact, I’ve often approached the subject in a wa ... Show More
16m 14s
Mar 2024
How To EFFECTIVELY Resolve Conflict In Your Marriage
Enjoy the episode? Send us a text!Are you struggling with conflict resolution in marriage? Do arguments feel draining instead of productive? Conflict is a natural part of relationships, but learning to fight constructively is essential for a healthy, lasting marriage. In this vid ... Show More
21m 24s
Nov 2023
How to Know When to End a Relationship
Make up or break up? Knowing when to call it quits.If you’ve ever been through a rough patch, you know this is a painful question to answer. Do you stick it out? Do you cut the cord and run? Do you sacrifice more to make it work? Do you demand your partner give up everything and ... Show More
39m 9s
Feb 2023
#48: 5 Questions to Assess the Emotional Health of Your Relationship
In today's episode, we're talking all about emotional health & safety in relationships. If you've ever wondered what "emotional safety" actually means, look no further - we'll be discussing some guiding principles and questions you can ask to assess how emotio ... Show More
18m 18s
May 2022
#8: Q&A: On All Things Love & Relationships
In this week's Q&A episode, we're exploring a mixed bag of love & relationship questions. Topics include how to navigate conflict with a partner who won't engage, how to manage your anxiety when physically apart from your partner, why you might be attracted to unhe ... Show More
25m 2s