Esther Perel says monogamy is now a choice rather than a given, so we must thoughtfully negotiate needs instead of feeling entitled to fulfill every desire. She believes partners who share core values and life vision, not just attraction, create relationships that thrive long-term. Though novelty and differences draw us in initially, over time differing worldviews often spark conflict with those we love. Ultimately Perel advises examining what fulfills us before exercising all our options.