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Tired of feeling like people just take advantage of your good nature?
Perhaps you loan money that never gets repaid, you get stuck baking for another fundraiser, or you drive out of your way to help a sister who never returns the favor. You basically put your life on hold for others, and it’s getting old.
That’s why, today I want to warn you about the five signs that scream “Walk all over me.”
Sign #1: You say yes out of guilt
Do you find yourself saying yes when you’d prefer to say no? Perhaps you even kick it up a notch and disguise your guilt behind acting like a cheerful giver.
Don’t be fooled my friend. True cheerfulness doesn’t come from an exterior smile, but rather from an interior attitude.
If you’re constantly saying yes and later regretting it, then it’s likely you’ve set yourself to be taken advantage of by others.
Oh, I’m not saying they’re not to blame for overstepping, but if someone is taking advantage of your good nature and you don’t stop it, there likely won’t be an end in sight.
You might do well to get some help over why you struggle with guilt, why you fall for their outlandish stories of desperation, and why their approval is more important than your peace.
If you need help unpacking the pains of your past, we’ve connected with Faithful Counseling. They can help you find a counselor that is right for you. Click above for all the details.
Sign #2: You avoid confrontation
Do you consider yourself a peacekeeper? Perhaps your motto is ‘peace at all cost.’
What if I told that there’s a difference between being a peacekeeper and a peacemaker?
The difference is, one is biblical, the other is not.
Peacemakers have peace ruling within their hearts.
Peacekeepers usually have fear, anxiety and resentment ruling within them.
Peacemakers are active.
Peacekeepers, on the other hand, are passive—and sometimes passive aggressive. They often go along to get along. They stay quiet so as not to disturb the peace even when a disturbance may be needed.
Peacemakers are honest about their feelings and circumstances and will even expose lies so that the wounds can begin to heal.
Peacekeepers on the other hand are often in denial about feelings and circumstances.
Peacemakers look for harmony through reconciliation.
Peacekeepers look for harmony through avoidance.
Sign #3: You apologize—all the time
Is ‘I’m sorry’ your go-to response?
While we’re called to repent of our wrongdoing, saying ‘I’m sorry’ just to keep others from experiencing bad feelings isn’t repentance, it’s enablement. AND it can make you a target for toxic people.
Keep your apologies for when you’ve truly done something wrong. Don’t apologize to manage someone’s emotions and make them feel better.
If you struggle with feeling resentful after you apologize, it’s likely you’re struggling with codependency. To learn how to stop people-pleasing and start God-pleasing, check out my online course Conquering Codependency Biblically. All the details are here for you.
Sign #4: You go with the flow<