logo
episode-header-image
Jun 2023
27m 44s

Male friendship

Bbc Radio 4
About this episode

The author and screenwriter Max Dickins was preparing to propose to his girlfriend when he came to a realisation: he didn’t have anyone he felt he could ask to be his best man. It prompted him to write the book ‘Billy No-Mates’, looking at why he didn’t have any close male friends any more, and asking if men, in general, have a friendship problem.

In a special discussion in front of a live audience at the Cheltenham Science Festival, Claudia Hammond speaks to Max about his journey alongside Professor Robin Dunbar and Dr Radha Modgil.

Robin Dunbar is a Professor of Evolutionary Psychology at Oxford University who’s spent decades researching friendships in humans and other primates. He’s also known for having Dunbar’s Number named after him, which suggests most of us have a limit to our social circles of around 150 people.

Radha Modgil is a practicing GP and wellbeing expert whose book ‘Know Your Own Power’ looks at what advice there is for people facing difficulties as they go through life.

The panel look at what psychology can teach us about friendships between men, the difference these relationships can make to our mental health, and the best way of both maintaining the friendships we have and finding ways to make new friends.

Produced in partnership with the Open University. Producer: Dan Welsh

Up next
Jul 1
All in the Mind Awards Ceremony
Many of us will experience mental health problems at some point in our lives – and it is often the help and support of those around us that can make all the difference to how we cope and recover.The BBC Radio 4 All in the Mind Awards recognises the unsung heroes who have helped m ... Show More
30m 18s
Jun 24
The Psychology of Curiosity at Cheltenham Science Festival
Is curiosity good for us, or should we learn a lesson from what curiosity did to the cat? And why does curiosity drive some people to explore the ends of the earth and beyond, while others just really aren’t very curious at all? As a journalist and author, Claudia Hammond has tur ... Show More
29m 17s
Jun 17
All About Twins
This week is all about twins. On today's programme we'll hear from a very special pair who are through to the final of the All in the Mind Awards, which celebrates those who have made a real difference to people’s mental health. We'll hear how the special bond between Lisa and Ro ... Show More
28m 26s
Recommended Episodes
Oct 2022
The Science of Making and Keeping Friends | Robin Dunbar
New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Friendship might not necessarily be something you’ve considered to be an urgent psychological and physiological issue. One thing we explore a lot on the show ... Show More
55m 1s
Aug 2021
The Science of Making and Keeping Friends | Robin Dunbar
Friendship might not necessarily be something you’ve considered to be an urgent psychological and physiological issue. On this show, we spend a lot of time exploring how the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives and our health. Sadly, in many ways, it’s ... Show More
1h 3m
Jan 2022
Friendships
The past two years of the pandemic have brought to the forefront a lot of issues that have strained or even broken our friendships. As we emerge from months when you may have lost touch with friends and are eager to reconnect, it is important to think strategically about maintain ... Show More
56m 8s
Oct 2022
The Science of Connection and Why We Should Deeply Value Our Friendships. With Dr. Marisa Franco
Dr. Marisa Franco is a New York Times bestselling Author, Professor, Psychologist, and self-proclaimed friendship expert. Marisa discusses the science of connection — and the importance of platonic friendships. Her new book is called Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can He ... Show More
39m 50s
Jun 2022
How to Keep Friendships From Imploding | Esther Perel
New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- “The quality of your relationships determines the quality of your life.”  These words from the legendary Esther Perel have the power to genuinely change your ... Show More
50m 51s
Sep 2022
Building Healthy Friendships Among Men
Founders of the popular comedic group The Skit Guys, Eddie and Tommy’s 30-year friendship didn’t start out as one might expect. Eddie and Tommy met in high school when Tommy stole Eddie’s girlfriend, and the Lord worked from there to spark in both of the men a love for friendship ... Show More
27m 40s
Mar 2021
The Science of Friendship, with Robin Dunbar and Helen Czerski
Robin Dunbar is the world-renowned psychologist and author who famously discovered Dunbar’s number: how our capacity for friendship is limited to around 150 people. In this week's episode he explains why friends matter to us – more than we think. The single most surprising fact t ... Show More
1h 1m
Jan 2023
271. Attachment and Friendship in Adulthood: A Conversation with Dr. Marisa G. Franco
I hear from clients all the time how hard it is to build new friendships in adulthood. But is that actually true? Or are we making that be true by holding onto outdated beliefs about friendship? If you desire more friendships in your life, you won’t want to miss my discussion wit ... Show More
36m 2s
Feb 2023
How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make and Keep Friends | Dr. Marisa G. Franco
New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Did you know that having friends can make you less depressed? One survey found that the average American had not made a new friend in the last five years but ... Show More
1h 9m