it's been awhile since we had a solo episode but my mom's recent visit brought up a lot of emotions, feelings and reflections. in the midst of me hashing out my feelings, i realized that for a large part of my life, i invalidated my feelings and suppressed a lot of my emotions. this led me to running away from myself, not being able to confront my feelings or why i was even feeling them in the first place. running away from myself was the easy part. working through trauma and built-up emotions is the hard part. but as i did (and am still doing) the inner working + healing from childhood trauma, it does get easier. the air is a bit more breathable. the weight gets lighter and lighter everyday. in current times, i find myself in a space that i've never been in before. finally embracing the uncomfortable. finally at a space where the discomfort of the unknown outweighs the comfort of my safety net. open and ready to evolve + receive all good things that the unknown has to offer. had i not stopped running from myself, i don't know if i would have ever arrived at this space. if you're currently in a race to outrun yourself, this is your sign to finally cross the finish line and embrace all versions of you (past, current, + future) with open arms.
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