logo
episode-header-image
Feb 2023
2h 1m

7 Ways We Self-Sabotage and How To Stop ...

Dr Rangan Chatterjee: GP & Author
About this episode

This week’s episode is all about a subject familiar to many of us: self-sabotage. Whether it’s the inability to stick to our health goals, leave a toxic relationship, or get that promotion, we often seem to be our own worst enemies. Self-sabotage is a spectrum of feelings, beliefs, and behaviours, but they all set us up to fail. 

 

Dr Ramani Durvasula is a clinical psychologist and Professor of Psychology at California State University, and a world-renowned expert on narcissistic personality disorder. She’s written two books on the subject, Should I Stay or Should I Go and Don’t You Know Who I Am. She hosts the podcast Navigating Narcissism, and posts regularly on her YouTube channel, which has over 1 million subscribers.

 

In this conversation, we talk about relationships not with others, but with ourselves. Dr Ramani talks us through the common ways in which many of us self-sabotage, including procrastination, social comparison, taking on too much and not living in alignment with our values. She explains their links to anxiety and perfectionism and shares the practical solutions that she uses with clients to overcome them. If you’ve ever considered having therapy, Dr Ramani provides some useful insights about how it can work.

 

We discuss a wide range of topics, including why so many of us stick around in toxic, unsupportive relationships, the importance of cultivating friendships and communities outside the home and not expecting our romantic partner to be all things to us. And you’ll hear Dr Ramani explain a new way of thinking about our inner critic.

 

Dr Ramani has decades of real world experience helping her clients, she is a brilliant communicator and this is a conversation full of fresh insights and practical insights that you are going to be able to implement immediately.


Support the podcast and enjoy Ad-Free episodes. Try FREE for 7 days on Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/feelbetterlivemore. For other podcast platforms go to https://fblm.supercast.com.


Thanks to our sponsors:

https://www.athleticgreens.com/livemore

https://www.vivobarefoot.com/livemore


Show notes https://drchatterjee.com/332


DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast and on this webpage is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

Up next
Jul 8
The Art of Communication: How to Stay Calm, Connected and In Control During Life’s Toughest Moments with Jefferson Fisher #571
Most of us spend our lives in conversation - yet very few of us are ever taught how to communicate well. Whether it’s with our partners, colleagues, family or friends, we often assume that being heard is the same as being understood. But true communication isn’t just about the wo ... Show More
2h 6m
Jul 3
BITESIZE | How to Reinvent Your Life This Summer: 5 Simple Habits That Really Work | Dr Rangan Chatterjee #570
The summer months have a different flavour and feel to the other months of the year; there’s something different about our energy, motivation and willpower. And, if we can harness those differences, we have a golden opportunity to make meaningful changes in our life. Feel Better ... Show More
22m 38s
Jul 1
How To Become Less Reactive & Cultivate A Deep Sense Of Calm with Jonny Miller #569
Many of us are living with chronically dysregulated nervous systems, yet we mistake this reactive state for normal. Research suggests that our nervous system acts as a lens through which we experience reality. But when that lens is out of balance, we start to see threats where no ... Show More
1h 51m
Recommended Episodes
Nov 2020
Narcissistic Doctors with Dr. Ramani Durvasula
This episode features Dr. Patrick C. Beeman as your host and our guest is the popular psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula talking about narcissism and narcissistic abuse within the medical profession. Check out Dr. Ramani's YouTube Channel.---Healthy versus Toxic is a podcast where ... Show More
1h 2m
Nov 2022
How To Heal & Move On From Narcissistic Relationships w/ Dr. Ramani EP 1344
Dr. Ramani Durvasula is a licensed clinical psychologist, author, and podcast host. The focus of Dr. Durvasula’s work is the etiology and impact of narcissism and high-conflict, entitled, antagonistic personality styles on human relationships, mental health, and societal expectat ... Show More
1h 35m
Apr 2024
Avoidant Personality Disorder
Healthy//Toxic Healthy versus Toxic is a podcast where licensed mental health professionals explore what makes a relationship healthy or unhealthy. Our hosts aim to provide a scientifically informed perspective on what factors go into making healthy relationships, how to build se ... Show More
23m 40s
Dec 2022
Grand Finale: Shining a Light on Mental Health in the Fashion Industry
Today’s episode is a special one because it marks our final episode, our grand finale after a great two year run! Today, we will take you back to the very beginning, back in 2019 before COVID-19 when Bridget Malcolm and Dr. Allie were scheming about how to open up this dialogue i ... Show More
46m 9s
Feb 2024
158: Practical Optimism with Dr. Sue Varma
Can we boost our sense of happiness and overall well-being? Why do some individuals not only survive - but thrive - in the face of life's challenges? Dr. Sue Varma, a psychiatrist and cognitive behavioral therapist joins us on the publication day of her new book, Practical Optimi ... Show More
36m 43s
Apr 2023
Knowing the Difference Between Psychopathy and Narcissism
Healthy//ToxicHealthy versus Toxic is a podcast where licensed mental health professionals explore what makes a relationship healthy or unhealthy. Our hosts aim to provide a scientifically informed perspective on what factors go into making healthy relationships, how to build sec ... Show More
25m 4s
May 2024
How to Deal With Difficult People: One Trick to Live a More Peaceful & Fulfilled Life
Do you want to know how to deal with difficult people? What about if that difficult person in your life is a parent, boss, ex, child, or partner? Today, renowned psychologist and narcissism expert Dr. Ramani Durvasula is here to give you the tricks you need to master to live a mo ... Show More
1h 32m
Feb 2024
669. Narcissism Red Flags, Healing from Abuse + Moving Toward Healthy Love with Dr. Ramani
In this episode, Krista welcomes Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a licensed clinical psychologist famous for her expertise in narcissism. On a mission to educate the masses about this high-conflict personality type, Dr. Ramani hosts the popular Navigating Narcissism podcast and has written ... Show More
1h 50m
May 2024
How to Deal with Uncertainty - Without Self-Sabotage
Most people don’t like uncertainty, but the people who can’t tolerate uncertainty the most are more likely to experience anxiety or depressive disorders, they’re more likely to struggle in relationships or not reach their potential in work or school. But here’s the thing. It’s no ... Show More
15m 33s
Jun 2024
Sabrina Zohar's No Bullshit Advice for Modern Dating, Healing Toxic Relationship Patterns, & Authentic Communication
Everyone's favorite entrepreneur turned no-bullshit dating coach Sabrina Zohar is here to drop some major truth bombs about what many people are getting wrong in relationships by playing games and avoiding the real work. Sabrina shares insights from her own dating journey and mis ... Show More
55m 47s