Have you ever played a game of tug of war, but with your parents, and it wasn't a game, but actually with your life?
The tug of war I'm talking about is the one where what your parents want for you doesn't necessarily align with what you want for yourself. We've all been there, the shouting matches that end up with you and your parents not agreeing on certain life choices of yours.
In today's episode I had the pleasure and honor of sitting down with Dr. Rania Awaad, someone who is truly a pinnacle in our community, to discuss our relationships and boundaries, or lack thereof with our parents and how we can find compassion and empathy in the midst of our disagreements.
The love language of immigrant parents is truly like no other. Yet, it doesn't negate the existence of the balancing act of trying to do things that make us happy vs what makes our parents happy. I asked Dr. Rania how do we reach a point where we can compromise rather than sacrifice our life choices when wanting to please our parents.
I also shared with her the weight I had carried of wanting to be a perfect daughter in every aspect and managing the struggle of wanting to be treated like an adult, yet our parents sometimes refuse to see us as such, even until the point of when we are married and have our own family.
I do want to mention that this conversation centers around parental relationships that DO NOT involve trauma/abuse. I do believe a separate conversation needs to be had when a relationship reaches such a severe level of toxicity and it is never ok to force anyone to remain in such harmful situations, even if it's your own parents.
I do hope that today's conversation provides you with more clarity on how to navigate these balancing acts and the pressures of living a life that has been pre-planned for you in a way. As mentioned in other episodes, boundaries are key, and so in this episode we also discuss how to set boundaries with our parents from an Islamic perspective.
Enjoy and follow the pod on Instagram:
@unsweetenedandunfiltered
Follow Dr. Rania Awaad on Instagram:
@dr.raniaawaad
Follow the Stanford Medicine Mental Health Lab:
@stanfordmmhl
Check out the Rahmah Foundation:
@therahmahfoundation
Muslim Mental Health Resources/ The Khalil Center:
Click here