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If you’re constantly choosing between disappointing other people and disappointing yourself, honestly, this video is for you. I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently because I’m 25, I’m planning to move to London, five hours away from my mum, and for probably the first time in my life, I’ve really felt that tug between what I want and what the people I love might prefer for me. And lowkey, I think learning how to disappoint people might be one of the most important parts of growing up. I’ve done it with my career too. I went to medical school because I wanted to. Then I eventually quit being a doctor, even though I knew my dad didn’t necessarily understand the decision. I spent so long weighing the pros and cons, and I genuinely reached the point where I knew my life would be worse if I stayed in medicine. That sounds dramatic, but it was true for me. This isn’t about becoming selfish or ignoring everyone’s advice. Real talk, sometimes your parents are right. Sometimes you genuinely do not know as much as you think you do. But there’s a difference between listening to people who love you and building your entire life around the fear of disappointing them. Especially if you’re trying to figure out how to stop people pleasing, how to set boundaries with family, how to stop caring what your parents think about your career, or how to choose yourself without feeling guilty. Working in healthcare also changed how I see all of this. Seeing young people suddenly become seriously unwell made me realise how unbelievably short and unpredictable life can be. It made me question why I was playing small just to keep everyone comfortable. Now I keep coming back to one question: Can I keep living like this? I asked it when I wanted to leave medicine. I’m asking it again while moving out of my small hometown and starting a new chapter. Honestly, every time I answer it truthfully, my life moves a little closer to something that actually feels like mine. So maybe the question isn’t, “Who will I disappoint if I choose myself?”Maybe it’s: How long are you willing to disappoint yourself instead?
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