When someone says "So you're saying that", pause and analyze their intent by listening to both words and tone—they may be seeking minimization, clarification, or misrepresentation of your statement.
Sarcastic tone behind "So you're saying that" reveals a hidden agenda to trap you rather than genuine clarification, signaling a verbal bully attempting to ridicule or misrepresent your position.
Taking a pause before answering, even when it feels like an eternity, demonstrates you're giving their statement serious thought and positions you as a trusted advisor and expert rather than appearing defensive.
When trapped by misrepresentation, respond with full clarification and detailed explanation instead of yes or no—control the conversation by rephrasing their question and asking if your restatement makes sense.
Practice active listening to detect tone behind words as an extra layer of information, because responding to the tone can be more effective than addressing content alone when handling verbal bullies.