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Aug 13
43 m

Why I stopped trying to save my brother

Alyssa Zander
About this episode

This is part two of my four-part Camino series— where I’m sitting down with the people I love most to talk about the moments that changed everything.

In this episode, I’m joined by my brother to talk about a pattern we didn’t even realize we were stuck in for years: me always trying to help, support, and take care of him… and how this codependent dynamic was negatively impacting our relationship. I share what it was like to realize that my need to feel needed was actually getting in the way of him building confidence and self-trust— and he shares what it felt like to grow up on the receiving end of that dynamic.

This conversation is honest and tender. It’s about the unspoken roles we take on in families and what happens when we decide to lay them down. We talk about how we’re rebuilding trust, choosing new ways of relating, and learning how to see each other as the full humans we are now— not just who we were growing up.

If you’ve ever felt like you had to hold it all together for a sibling— or are trying to unlearn patterns that kept you “connected” but not close… this one’s for you.

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