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Mar 2025
1h 2m

How to Stop Letting Fear Control Your Li...

MARK MANSON
About this episode

You know that voice in your head that loves to tell you that you suck? Yeah, that one. The one that compares you to everyone on Instagram, tells you you’re a failure for eating cereal at 11 p.m., and insists you’ll never get your life together. Well, today, we’re calling in a professional to deal with that assh*le. Dr. Julie Smith is a clinical psychologist and viral mental health educator who’s built a massive following by actually making psychology make sense. In this episode, she breaks down how to quiet that inner critic, stop getting crushed by comparison, and reframe your self-loathing into something a little more useful—like self-respect.


We also dig into what it’s like to become internet famous when you’re an introvert, why emotions are not facts (even though they feel like they are), and how to stop letting social media, your parents, and your own bullsh*t beliefs define your worth. Whether you’re stuck in a shame spiral, wondering why life feels pointless, or just trying to figure out how to not hate yourself so much, this episode is for you.


Get a free sample pack with any drink mix purchase at https://drinklmnt.com/idgaf


Use code IDGAF to get 10% your health services at https://marekhealth.com/idgaf


Dr. Julie’s new book, Open When: A Companion for Life's Twists & Turns: https://www.amazon.com/Open-When-Companion-Lifes-Twists-ebook/dp/B0D3CB1XX6


Dr. Julie’s first book, Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?: https://www.amazon.com/Why-Nobody-Told-This-Before-ebook/dp/B0983L6T32


Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough


Follow Dr. Julie:

https://www.youtube.com/@DrJulie

https://www.instagram.com/drjulie

https://www.tiktok.com/@drjulie

https://x.com/drjuliesmith

https://www.facebook.com/DrJulieSmith/


Follow Me:

https://instagram.com/markmanson/

https://twitter.com/IAmMarkManson

https://facebook.com/Markmansonnet/

https://linkedin.com/in/markmanson/

https://www.tiktok.com/@iammarkmanson


Chapters:

0:00 Introduction'

01:21 Using social media to improve mental health?

04:50 How Dr. Julie stays sane

07:01 When Dr. Julie has to take her own advice

14:01 How to deal with comparing yourself to others too much

24:21 The human capacity for resilience

32:56 How to be less lonely

36:57 How to know if therapy is working

43:19 What about nihilism?

52:13 Where do most parents get it wrong?

56:46 What about when you hate yourself?


Theme Music: Icarus Lives by Periphery, used with permission from Periphery.

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