Do you ever feel like you're doing so much for everyone in your life—managing relationships, fixing problems, carrying the emotional load—only to end up completely burned out? Today, I sit down with the incredible Terri Cole, psychotherapist and author of Boundary Boss, to uncover why so many of us fall into this cycle and, most importantly, how to break free.
Terri dives deep into what high-functioning codependency really looks like, and trust me, it’s not the old-school definition you might have in mind. This conversation hit home for me in a big way, and I got super vulnerable about my own recovery journey. Together, we unpack everything from unsolicited advice-giving (yep, we’ve all done it!) to setting boundaries that stick and respecting others' autonomy even when it’s hard.
If you’re constantly over-functioning, people-pleasing, or just plain exhausted from “managing” everyone in your life, this episode is your permission to stop. You’ll walk away with actionable steps to start shifting your habits, nurture healthier relationships, and finally put yourself back on your priority list. Tune in for this and much more!
"You need to get in recovery. Because we need everything that you have to give to the world, and you're only going to be able to do it if you're not micromanaging a million other people." ~ Terri Cole
In this episode:
- Defining high-functioning codependency
- Recognizing codependent traits and behaviors
- How to escape the advice-giving trap
- Overcoming the fear of setting boundaries
- Dealing with the illusion of control and its impact
- Managing emotional triggers during recovery
- Self-sacrificing and auto-accommodating behaviors
- Anticipatory planning and over-functioning in relationships
- Action steps to break codependent habits
- The path to recovery and peace
- Recognizing and dealing with personal growth in recovery
- Embracing joy and peace: the evidence of codependency recovery
- How to access the High-Functioning Codependency Toolkit
Resources Mentioned in the Episode:
Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1683647688
Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1649631863
High-Functioning Codependency Toolkit (HFC Toolkit): https://www.terricole.com/hfc/
Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off our first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to www.Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code JENG.
Connect with Terri Cole:
Website:https://www.terricole.com/
IG: https://www.instagram.com/terricole/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TerriColeLCSW/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/terri-cole
Where to find me:
IG: https://www.instagram.com/jen_gottlieb/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jen_gottlieb
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Jenleahgottlieb
Website: https://jengottlieb.com/
My business: https://www.superconnectormedia.com/