“What am I doing? I’m performing for other people,” says Rochelle Younan-Montgomery, published author, keynote speaker and founder and CEO of The Reset. In the wake of a physically and emotionally agonizing miscarriage, Rochelle attempted to override her grief by powering through at work. Like so many who experience burnout, she felt her worth was tied to her productivity and performance, and today on FRIED she discusses how she learned to overcome that mindset, as well as how it was shaped by religion, racism and growing up in an immigrant family.

Rochelle discusses how she learned to listen to her body's cues as a means of gaging a misalignment with her authenticity and soul's purpose. She talks about knowing when it's time to stop excavating and to start putting knowledge into practice. She also shares her "Open the Front Door" framework for entering into discussions that prevent the build up of resentment and allows both parties to be heard and to set clear boundaries.

Join today's discussion to learn what Rochelle has learned from her years of deep spiritual work as well as from her yoga practice.

Quotes

“I thought I could power through. I thought, ‘No, I’ve got this. I’ve held a lot in the past. I’m good. I’ll show up. Work matters most. Productivity matters most. I have responsibilities. I can grieve quietly and secretly. I had a male boss, so I didn’t feel safe to share with him.” (7:10 | Rochelle Younan-Montgomery)
“And then it just became clear, ‘What am I doing? I’m performing for other people. I’m performing like this, ‘I’ve got my shit together,’ kind of person that can handle anything. What is that saying, especially to my daughter? What message does that send that I don’t deserve time and space to grieve and for my body to heal?” (8:21 | Rochelle Young-Montgomery)
“I don’t have time and energy nor do I want to choose to override my body and mind and spirit anymore because my family and my kids and my well-being matter more to me than performing and being perfect and showing up as ’the strong leader.’” (9:50 | Rochelle Younan-Montgomery)
“When I don’t feel authentic, when I don’t feel like I’m in my truth, my body tells me. And I, for a long time, have not been in tune with my body, so looking back, I can look at that situation more clearly now. At the time, I just felt, ‘Oh, maybe I’m a little bit nervous because I’m doing something in front of a group.’ But that’s never been an issue for me, I love having a captive audience. It’s more about—now, looking back I can see—oh, prayer, in that way, felt like I was maybe lying. Something felt disingenuous and my body was screaming trying to tell me, ‘What are we doing here? Do we really believe this?’” (19:22 | Rochelle Younan-Montgomery)

Links

Connect with Rochelle Younan-Montgomery:

https://www.rochelleym.com

https://www.instagram.com/the_reset_by_ro/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/rochelleyounanmontgomery/

https://www.rochelleym.com/download

Connect with Cait:

Cait Donovan is a keynote speaker, author, and host of FRIED: The Burnout Podcast, specializing in burnout, mis/match, and sustainable performance at work. She partners with corporate leaders, teams, and professional associations through keynotes, workshops, and leadership sessions that treat burnout as data, not failure, to help organizations reduce burnout without blame or shame and build healthier, high performing cultures.

To bring Cait to your organization or event, book an inquiry call here: https://bit.ly/bookcait

Learn more about Cait’s speaking work: https://www.caitdonovan.com/speaking

Short on time? Watch this 3-min video: https://bit.ly/caitdreel2025

Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm