"The narcissist is at all times a deceiver, never straight, clear or true. He/she has mastered the ability to delude himself and others. Like a socerer, he hatches intricate plots in secret..." (From: Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your Life, Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., LMFT).
For many years you played your role of partner and spouse to the high level narcissist, knowing that he/she was psychologically toxic. You are exhausted at all times. You have chronic insomnia and can't sleep at night. You get up in the morning and drag yourself through the day.
You are now full circle and heavy with exceptional exhaustion. In the past you jacked yourself up with coffee, plunged into exercise, distracted yourself with fantasies and long held wishes. The mental tricks have worn thin; they don't work anymore.
Remind yourself that you are genuine; you are not deluded. You are highly empathic and care deeply about the feelings of others - family members, friends.
Let the narcissistic world twirl by at ever increasing speeds as it goes nowhere.
Give yourself credit for being a true individual who is growing and evolving. Know that this is a process that takes time and effort and that you are moving toward developing a stronger, expanded true self.
Follow your unique path and pace. Practice self care - Rest, Sleep, Movement/Exercise, Nourishing Food, Listening to Calming Music, Spend time with Nature, the great healer.
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