logo
episode-header-image
Aug 2023
1h 1m

Avoid These 3 Conversation Pitfalls For ...

THE ART OF CHARM
About this episode

In today’s episode, we cover the 3 pillars of powerful communication with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael Herold. 

Humans are social creatures and history has taught us that powerful communication can help anyone achieve any goal we have in life, but what are the 3 pillars of powerful communication, how can you strengthen each one, and what are you risking by never becoming a powerful communicator? 

What to Listen For

  • First pillar of powerful communication – 0:00
  • What is the difference between hearing what someone is telling you vs actively listening to someone?
  • What are the 3 layers of listening you need to understand so the people around you feel like they are important to you?
  • What is the crucial skill you are missing to get ahead professionally, personally, and romantically?


  • Second pillar of powerful communication – 22:17
  • What is the biggest pitfall you make in conversation that can kill a connection and make people not want to talk to you?
  • How do you give people value in a conversation so they want to know more about you and spend more time with you?


  • Third pillar of powerful communication – 35:53
  • What is the one thing you should pay attention to if you don’t want your friendships, relationships, or even your marriage to fail?
  • What is an emotional bid and how do you recognize each of the 9 types in conversation so you can build long lasting connections with anyone you meet?

A Word From Our Sponsors


Curious about your influence level? 


Get your Influence Index Score today!


Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence


Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? 


That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? 


Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Up next
Aug 21
The Social Domino Effect [Social Intelligence Brief]
What if the biggest wins in your career, relationships, and social life didn’t require three separate strategies? In this episode, AJ and Johnny reveal the Social Domino Effect—how one small, high-leverage shift can cascade into success across every domain of your life. They unpa ... Show More
12m 58s
Aug 18
Why Strengths Become Weaknesses | Martin Dubin
Executive coach and former CEO Martin Dubin joins AJ and Johnny to reveal the hidden blind spots that quietly sabotage leaders and high performers. From the Dunning–Kruger effect to the “fishbowl” and “cabana” phenomena, Marty shows how strengths overused become weaknesses, and w ... Show More
57m 44s
Aug 14
5 Levels of Listening [Social Intelligence Brief]
Ever leave a meeting thinking it went fine… but something didn’t land? In this concise training, AJ and Johnny unpack the five levels of listening and the “conversation radar” that lets you hear what others don’t say. You’ll learn how to move beyond facts and small talk into cont ... Show More
18m 38s
Recommended Episodes
Apr 2024
Have Lasting Conversations: The Rule of 3 & Threading Magic!
Feeling awkward in conversations? Don't worry, charm isn't about you - it's about making others feel heard!00:00:00 Hello listeners00:01:28 Talk WITH people and not TO them00:17:18 Sustain Conversations with Conversational Threading and Useful AcronymsThis video dives into Chapte ... Show More
30m 7s
Jul 2022
#502: CONFIDENT COMMUNICATION: HOW TO HAVE MORE CONNECTION AND MORE INFLUENCE WITH OTHERS
Confident communication opens doors of opportunity and creates healthy relationships that thrive. Most people are too rushed or too timid to tap fully into the wealth that is available to them through confident communication. This is a must-listen for anyone who wants to improve ... Show More
41m 30s
Jun 2024
How to Become a Super Communicator And Change Your Life
WORDS have POWER. This FLASHBACK MASHUP episode will teach you how to HARNESS that power by becoming a master communicator.You’ll hear profound teachings from me and one of the greatest communicators on the planet, John Maxwell.This episode is packed with valuable strategies that ... Show More
1h 33m
May 2024
Unlock the Language of CONNECTION: 3 HACKS for Supercommunicators to Build TRUST & INFLUENCE
Are you ready to transform your communication skills and build deeper, more meaningful relationships? In this episode of The School of Greatness, Lewis explores the art of communication with three exceptional guests. First, Charles Duhigg, Pulitzer Prize-winning reporter and best ... Show More
1h 16m
Feb 2024
EASY STEPS TO BECOME A SUPER COMMUNICATOR (THAT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND)
How to become a SUPER COMMUNICATOR!In todays' episode of The Ed Mylett Show, you’ll learn EASY steps to become a MASTER COMMUNICATOR with me and my phenomenal guest, Charles Duhigg, a Pulitzer Prize-winning genius whose work has revolutionized how we understand habits, productivi ... Show More
1h 1m
Mar 2023
How to Speak Up for Yourself: Simple Strategies for Being Heard
In this episode, you’re learning how to speak up for yourself and make sure that you are heard. Whether you want to be more influential and visible at work or there’s a hard conversation that you’ve been avoiding with a family member, this episode will empower you to have a break ... Show More
56m 57s
Jul 2022
How to Improve Your Communication Skills Today
You will always get more of what you want when your communication moves toward a common goal.--How to Improve Your Communication Skills TodayToday you are going to have opportunities to communicate. Here’s how to create conversations that connect:1) Meet folks where they are. Ple ... Show More
11m 3s
Feb 2023
78. Three Guiding Principles for Successful Communication
To celebrate our 75th episode, we hosted a live "Ask Me Anything" event with Matt. In this global gathering, listeners called in with questions ranging from making a first impression and giving negative feedback to presenting virtually and the worst communication advice Matt's ev ... Show More
26m 5s
Aug 2023
Ep. 79 - Cultivating Assertive Communication
In this week’s episode, Barb and Michelle discuss the art of assertive communication, and how we all can cultivate the skills needed to communicate in this way. Plus, they share their own personal experiences being afraid to be assertive for fears of not being liked, and more! Fo ... Show More
1h 2m
Feb 2024
How to Have Better Conversations (with author Charles Duhigg)
Gwyneth is joined by the Pulitzer Prize–winning journalist and author of Supercommunicators to talk about the art and science behind meaningful conversation. Duhigg explains the three types of conversations, what makes certain ones work, and the traits of highly effective communi ... Show More
1h 3m