Many individuals have narcissistic friends who are taking advantage of them and who cannot be trusted with confidences or personal information. High level narcissists, those who are socially smooth and highly successful in the world, are difficult to detect. They effect a convincing pseudo empathy, appear to be genuinely engaged, come across as bright, articulate and share much in common with you.
Recognizing the folllowing personality attributes will help you to identify the high level narcissistic personality:
Total Self-Absorption - The high level narcissist is completely self-focused. Everything in his/her internal or external environment is about tthem: personal experiences, professional accomplishments, academic achievements, successful business ventures, coming from "perfect families" ---an endless list of an Ode to Self.
There is a grandiosity and superiority to the self-absorption of the high level. He/she brags, flaunts, struts--always moving about the stage to catch the center spotlight.
Lack of Empathy - This is a key human quality that is missing in the high level narcissist. Having empathy, we are capable of putting ourelves in the other person's place, psychologically and emotionally. We leave our ego needs and sense what they are experiencing and feeling. The narcissist never developed this quality. Don't expect the high level narcissist to ever be become empathic.
Lack of Genuine Warmth - High Level Narcissists are cold and manipulative. They can appear to be charming and ingratiating---even irresistible. But this is a trap. Watch the follow-up to the fake rush of warmth. Does your friend drop the ball, forget to call you. Do you have to initiate all of the contacts between the two of you. Does your friend cancel engagements with you or act out by being a "no-show" and expect you to make excuses for him/her.
Exploitive - All relationships with high level narcissists are exploitive. Believing that you have an authentic relationship with a narcissist is an illusion. High level narcissists are users. In some instances they co-opt your creative ideas and projects and use them as their own. They feed off of others psychologically. They expect their "friends" to be constant sources of narcissistic supplies, providing them with veneration and adulation. They expect to be treated as very special and highly entitled. You could be on the receiving end of one of their harsh, vituperative projections. High level narcissists are known for projecting their psychological venom on to others. You don't deserve this. You are entitled to an apology (which will not be forthcoming).
There is a time of your evolving insight that you can no longer be treated with this level of disrespect. Now you understand that your "friend" is a narcissistic personality. You have done your research and along with your intuition, recognize your "friend's" true nature.
Practice self care and restoration. Take time to get the rest and sleep that you deserve. Focus on your needs rather than the demands of any narcissists. Explore your many creative gifts. Spend time with the beauty of Nature. Listen to beautiful music and move at your own pace. Honor and appreciate your individuality.
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