What if your patterns didn’t define you, but showed you EXACTLY where you can grow?

Why do we keep choosing the same people—even when we know better?

If you’ve felt luckless, stuck, or so far away from the loving partnership you want in life, we’ve got the MOST expansive episode for you.

In this powerful conversation, Jessica welcomes renowned relationship teacher and NYT best-selling author and podcast host, Jillian Turecki, for a grounded, radically honest look at why our love lives can feel stuck, painful, or endlessly cyclical—even after doing years of self-help work.

They explore what it really means to take accountability without blame, why nervous system regulation is the missing piece in most relationship advice, and how to tell the difference between a need and a wound. Jillian opens up about her own divorce, how her father’s betrayal shaped her patterns, and what it took to fully reclaim her worth.

You’ll also hear practical tools for pausing reactivity, unpacking unhealthy dynamics, and moving from “I am this” to “I’m working on this.” Whether you’re heartbroken, dating, partnered, or reflecting on your past, this episode will give you a new framework for conscious love.

Healing your relationship patterns isn’t about finding the perfect person—it’s about becoming your truest self so the most aligned dynamic can find you.

**Trigger Warning: Brief mention of “Big T” childhood traumas between 50:35 through 51:18 **

Find the complete show notes here -> https://tobemagnetic.com/expanded-podcast

Resources:

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The Pathway Membership gives you unlimited access to all of our manifestation workshops—including How to Manifest, Unblocking Your Inner Child, Shadow, Love, Money, Rock Bottoms, Ruts, and Energetic Updates —plus 70+ self-hypnosis tracks designed to unlock your full potential.

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In This Episode We Talk About:

How to take accountability in relationships without falling into self-blame
The connection between childhood wounds and adult relationship dynamics
Recognizing emotional needs vs. surface-level triggers in partnership
Why reactivity destroys connection—and how to build the pause muscle
The myth of finding “everything” in one person
How trauma bonds are formed through shared emotional wounds
How personal accountability and nervous system regulation can lead you to your highest self
Moving from fixed identity (“I am avoidant”) to fluid healing
Tools for catching black-and-white thinking and inner protector parts
Shifting from victimhood to empowerment in family relationships
Why your partner is a mirror—and how to read the reflection
Choosing partners as a reflection of your evolving self-worth

Mentioned In the Episode:

Jillian’s book: It Begins With You: The 9 Hard Truths About Love That Will Change Your Life
Find our Money Challenge plus all our workshops and all workshops mentioned inside our Pathway Membership (Including the Conflict DI, Self-Love DI, and Reset DI)

Connect with Jillian!

Jillian on IG @jillianturecki
Jillian’s podcast On Love
It Begins With You: The 9 Hard Truths About Love That Will Change Your Life

Join us at the How To Manifest Book Tour!

LA 12/6

Limited VIP & Early Bird Discount available

HOW TO MANIFEST by Lacy Phillips

(with exercises by Jessica Gill)

Pre-Order NOW

The Expanded Podcast, from To Be Magnetic™ (TBM), is the leading manifestation podcast rooted in neuroscience, psychology, and energetics. Hosted by TBM’s Chief Content Officer Jessica Gill, with monthly appearances from founder Lacy Phillips, Expanded is where science and the mystical meet to help you manifest in the most grounded, practical, and life-changing way.

At TBM, we’ve redefined manifestation through Neural Manifestation™—our proven, science-backed method developed with neuroscientist Dr. Tara Swart. This process helps you reprogram limiting beliefs at the subconscious level so you can create the life most aligned with your authenticity.

Each week, we take you inside the TBM practice to help you expand your subconscious to believe what you desire is possible. Through expert interviews, thought leader conversations, TBM teachings, and real member success stories, you’ll learn how to:
– Rewire your subconscious mind and step into your worth
– Heal your inner child and integrate shadow work
– Set boundaries, strengthen intuition, and reclaim self-worth
– Manifest relationships, careers, abundance, and experiences that align with your true self

With over than 40 million downloads and a global community in over 100 countries, Expanded has become the gold standard in manifestation content. Think of it as your weekly practice for expanding your mind, believing what you want is possible, and manifesting the life you’re meant to live.

Past guests include leading voices such as Mel Robbins, Lewis Howes, Jenna Zoe, Martha Beck, Dr. Joe Dispenza, Dr. Gabor Maté, Mark Groves, and Brianna Wiest.

Where To Find Us!

@tobemagnetic (IG)
@Lacyannephillips
Lacy Launched a Substack! - By Candlelight - Join Here
@Jessicaashleygill
@tobemagnetic (youtube)
@expandedpodcast

355 After a Really Crappy Day