logo
episode-header-image
May 2023
32m 42s

Look Into My Eyes

PATRICK KING
About this episode

Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home

Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ExtractInfo

00:01:16 From Patrick King's book how to Extract Info, Secrets and Truth, let's take a look at the importance of eye contact and then spend some time discussing active listening.

00:03:34 Effects of Eye Contact and Social Status on the Perception of a Job Applicant in an Employment Interviewing Situation

00:03:56 Accurate Intelligence Assessments in Social Interactions, Mediators and Gender Effects

00:05:34 A 2016 Japanese study by Kajimura and Nomura titled When We Cannot Speak eye Contact Disrupts Resources Available to Cognitive Control Processes During Verb Generation

00:06:22 Helping Children Think Gaze Aversion and Teaching by Phelps and Doherty Snedden, researchers found that kids told to look away while thinking and solving problems showed a 20% increase in performance.

00:07:51 Eye Contact, Distance and Affiliation

00:22:41 Label Emotions

• Eye contact is essential for building trust. If you aren’t able to use eye contact, people will find you untrustworthy. The optimal eye contact period is around three seconds of eye contact at a time, with sufficient rest between gazes.

• Active listening is a valuable skill set that any person should master, but the techniques of active listening can also help you improve your elicitation abilities and gather more information about people. You need to comprehend, retain and respond to the information people are sharing with you.

• You can build rapport and connection in many ways, for example by restating, reflecting, summarizing, labeling emotions, probing (gently!) and using silence to encourage the other person to open up. Open-ended or leading questions (like those covered in the previous chapter) can subtly guide a person to open up to you.


• Avoid giving advice, lecturing, sermonizing or judging.


• Active listening techniques are best used when you would like someone to open up with you and share their true feelings. Other techniques are more appropriate for detecting deception.


#ActiveListener #Binetti #CommunicationSkills #DohertySneddon #EmpatheticReflection #EyeContact #GazeAversion #GazeDuration #Kajimura #Kressler #LieDetection #NeuroLinguisticProgramming #Nomura #NonverbalCommunication #PupilDilation #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoExtractInfo #Secrets #andTruth

Up next
Jun 26
Beyond Destinations: Zach Smith's Story - Voice over Work - An Audiobook Sampler
Intentions and Transformative Travel with Anywhere.com Founder, Zach SmithIn this episode of 'The Science of Self,' host Russell interviews Zach Smith, the founder and CEO of Anywhere.com. Zach shares his story of how a post-college trip to Oaxaca inspired the creation of his com ... Show More
15m 58s
Jul 2
Mastering the Art of Listening: Chapter Two 'Improve Your People Skills'
00:03:21 We Have Two Ears and Only One Mouth00:08:56 Ineffective listening00:15:59 TakeawayImprove Your People Skills: How to Connect With Anyone, Communicate Effectively, Develop Deep Relationships, and Become a People Person By Patrick KingHear it Here - https://adbl.co/3nQxB0N ... Show More
16m 50s
Jun 24
Highlights from The Literary Pugilist: Mark Connor's Journey - Voice over Work - An Audiobook Sampler
Mark Connor on Boxing, Writing, and Reconnecting with Faith | The Science of SelfSee the full interview at https://youtu.be/EhcVLPlyiGkIn this episode of The Science of Self, we sit down with Mark Connor, a literary pugilist from St. Paul, Minnesota. Mark discusses his unique car ... Show More
13m 16s
Recommended Episodes
Aug 2023
How to Turn On a Guy INSTANTLY (with Your Eyes)
In a digital age dominated by screens, genuine eye contact has become a rarity. But did you know that it holds the key to enhancing memory, emotional closeness, and immediate attraction? Dr. Lewandowski and I explore the science behind eye contact and offer practical insights to ... Show More
26m 31s
Mar 2024
Quieting Your Mental Chatter (with Moments of Space cofounder Kim Little)
Today, we’re sharing a conversation from our last In goop Health summit. Kim Little is a software developer, lifelong meditator, and cofounder of Moments of Space, a new meditation app that teaches an eyes-open technique. Little joined Gwyneth onstage to talk about how we can fin ... Show More
34m 11s
Jul 2024
How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes Book Summary | Free Audiobook
Ad-free audiobook summary & exclusive content | Show notes (Free Summary) | PDF & Infographic | Free audiobook | Elevate your chat game with Leil Lowndes' How to Talk to Anyone! Discover 92 foolproof tricks to charm, disarm, and connect in any scenario.🇩🇪 German Read on your te ... Show More
16m 31s
Jan 2024
Practice Your Active Listening Skills
When was the last time you practiced your active listening skills? HBR contributing editor Amy Gallo says it is a skill you need to practice. In this episode, you’ll learn how you can use listening skills to make other people feel heard and understood. Specifically, you’ll learn ... Show More
10m 13s
Jun 2024
2202: How to Relate to Others by Tynan on Improving Relationships & Better Communication Skills
Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.Episode 2202:Tynan shares his journey from being naturally unempathetic to developing a deeper understanding of others. Through pers ... Show More
9m 6s
Jun 2024
184. Making Your Way Toward the Spotlight and Becoming More Visible with Melanie Whittaker
Are you a hidden gem in your field? Do you have valuable insights but hold back from sharing them for fear of being visible? In this episode, we explore the power of personal branding and communication for professionals who want to step into the spotlight and become the front-fac ... Show More
21m 7s
Apr 2024
Why Better Conversations Will Improve Your Health, Essential Skills To Enhance Your Relationships & Why Men Struggle To Open Up with Nihal Arthanayke #446
Today we’re going meta, as they say. Because this is a conversation about…conversation. More than that, it’s a deep and meaningful exchange about why effective, authentic dialogue is so important to humankind – and yet seemingly in decline. And who better to exchange words with o ... Show More
2h 1m
Jun 2024
462: How To Have Better Conversations
Opening up to vulnerability, asking better questions and mindfulness are all tools to have better conversations and improve your relationships. Listen to today's show for actionable tips to engage with your partner, friends and family in deeper conversations. In this episode with ... Show More
36m 16s
Jun 2024
Unlocking Relationship Secrets: Ekta DB on Modern Love, Situationships, and Parenting
Join Ashdin as he dives deep into the world of relationships with Ekta DB, a renowned Life & Relationship Coach turned Instagram Influencer. Discover powerful strategies for nurturing love relationships, handling situationships, and effective parenting. Ekta shares her expert tip ... Show More
56m 26s