logo
episode-header-image
Jul 10
29m 7s

Empty nester wisdom with Pamela Henkelma...

Courtney DeFeo and Christian Parenting
About this episode

We have another great episode in the Empty Nester Wisdom series with Empty Nest Coach and host of the Midlife Momma Podcast, Pamela Henkelman. It was so fun to watch her soar in this conversation and it’s clear she has a passion in this phase of motherhood.

Pamela shares that this is a very sweet time of life that we can enjoy. We don’t need to dread this transition. It’s a season where we can rediscover our purpose and our joy. I know she will get you excited to look ahead to this new phase with excitement not dread.

My favorite part is when she talks about her intentional thinking around relationships. She doesn’t just prioritize the relationship with her kids, she aims at loving their spouses well. Even if you’re 10 years out from being an “in-law,” tuck away this wisdom from a seasoned mom that is running her empty nest race well.

In this episode, we chat about:

  • Allowing children to grow independently
  • Connecting with their spouses
  • Choosing your words wisely with adult children
  • Letting go of expectations with holidays


Enjoy!

Courtney 


Chapters

(00:00) Introduction and Personal Connections

(02:57) Transitioning to Empty Nest Coaching

(05:55) Navigating Relationships with Adult Children

(08:57) Setting Boundaries with Adult Children

(11:58) The Role of Spouses and In-Laws

(15:00) Rediscovering Identity in Midlife

(18:01) Embracing New Opportunities

(20:49) Creating a Welcoming Home Environment

(24:03) Success Stories and Client Transformations

(26:46) Conclusion and Resources



Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess 

Courtney DeFeo


2025-2026 Prayer Journal: A Great Cloud of Witnesses


Resources from today’s show:

Connect with Pamela Henkelman

Free! 10 things NOT to say to your adult child

Sheepgate - addiction recovery in Iowa


Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org



Our Sponsors:
* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com
* Check out Mr. Pen and use my code MESS10 for a great deal: https://mrpen.com


Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Up next
Yesterday
How spiritual growth is intertwined with physical health with Justin Whitmel Earley
How are the habits of your family? How is your physical health? Mental health? Spiritual health? This is an episode that is so needed for couples. I would LOVE for you to listen with your spouse and then find time to discuss it.Justin Earley shares about this mental health breakd ... Show More
35m 28s
Oct 6
Week 5: Praise God - Job
I will praise the Lord at all times. I will constantly speak his praises.I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart.Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt his name together.I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my ... Show More
9m 27s
Oct 2
My Virtual Mentor: Intimacy with God with Stacey Thacker
I believe the key to parenting, marriage and life is this topic right here - intimacy with God. Are we spending time with God? How do we do this as moms? What if we tried and it's too hard? It can be so intimidating to learn about “quiet times” and “prayers.” We are joined today ... Show More
37m 35s
Recommended Episodes
Feb 2025
Healing Old Wounds and Breaking Generational Cycles: Melanie Shankle & Lisa Steven
This week, we’re delighted to welcome back author and speaker Melanie Shankle. Through her reflections on overcoming a challenging childhood and breaking generational cycles of dysfunction, Melanie shares profound insights on motherhood, the power of faith, and how to turn painfu ... Show More
22m 47s
Jan 2025
# 361: Elisha and the Boy Who Sneezed Back to Life - Elisha part 6
 2 Kings 4:18-37 & John 9:1-3 In today’s episode, we continue our exciting Elisha series with the incredible story of how God used Elisha to bring a boy back to life! We’ll pick up where we left off: the boy grew up strong and healthy, but one day, tragedy struck. What followed w ... Show More
12m 59s
Sep 25
How God Leads You Out of Distress and Into Peace (Psalm 18:19)
Today’s Bible Verse: "He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me." — Psalm 18:19 Psalm 18:19 reminds us that God’s rescue is not only about deliverance from danger—it’s about being brought into freedom and security, rooted in His love. David ... Show More
8m 38s
Sep 2023
Life-Changing Grace for Our Darkest Moments: Max Lucado & Jeff Allen
We all make mistakes in our lives—big and small—and worry about letting people down, or not living up to who we think we should be. But imagine if someone saw our mistakes, no matter how grave, and instead of chastising us, still believed in us and thought we were amazing? That’s ... Show More
23m 51s
Jan 2025
Knowing God As A Father | Joel Osteen
Many people know God as their Savior, but when you know God as a Father, it takes on a whole new meaning. He is with you as a constant source of strength and encouragement.Your best days are still ahead, and together we can make a difference in this world with the message of God' ... Show More
30m 1s
Apr 2023
God Makes All Things Beautiful, In His Time: Aaron Tippin, Isaiah and Jude Kofie, & Bill Magnusson
One of the greatest markers of our adult life is when we fully come to realize that we were designed with intention, created for a specific purpose and mission. Nothing God has ever done has been an accident, and He knows every part of you, even the talents you might not have rea ... Show More
24m 36s
Jul 2024
EP.113 Mike Turrigiano: The Biggest Obstacle to GOOD Discipleship
Mike Turrigiano goes off about the problem with modern day Christianity and it's struggle to properly disciple. He calls it "Consumer Christianity" and how we pick and choose what parts of the faith walk we want to actually live out. He hands out some gems in this episode over gr ... Show More
1h 20m
Aug 27
What to Do When No One Understands You (Job 12:5)
Today’s Bible Verse: “He who is at ease holds calamity in contempt, as though disaster were for those whose feet slip.” - Job 12:5 It’s easy to show compassion when life is hard—but what about when we’re comfortable? In Job 12:5, we’re reminded how easy it is for those “at ease” ... Show More
8m 19s
Jul 24
You Haven't Missed Your Moment: God's Restoration is Coming (Joel 2:25)
Today’s Bible Verse – Joel 2:25 (NIV) "I will restore you for the years that the swarming locust has eaten,the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army which I sent among you." - Joel 2:25 Have you lost time, opportunities, or peace in a season of hardship? In Joel 2: ... Show More
8m 44s
Nov 2023
An LGBTQ Mom Responds to Andy Stanley (w/ Melinda Patrick) - Ep. 77
Statistics show that one in five Gen Z children are identifying somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum. One in five. The church needs to have a loving and truthful approach for families facing this issue.   One of the largest and most influential churches in the United States, North Poi ... Show More
51m 18s