logo
episode-header-image
Apr 2024
48m 1s

Toxic Shame Of Complex Post Traumatic St...

Jennifer Wallace & Elisabeth Kristof
About this episode

As a human, you have most likely felt shame to some degree. Although it is a normal human protective emotion to keep us safe on a societal level, shame can become toxic when it persists and when we internalize the critical narrative from that shame. Toxic shame shows up in many ways, however, the way it shows up physiologically is understood the least, but the most telling. From posture, dilated pupils, tense muscles, to inflammation in the body, headaches, and diseases, it is possible to visibly see shame on a person’s body. This is a result of the body protecting itself, and there is no shame in that. However once it becomes maladaptive, and absolute “I am” statements start becoming permanent fixtures in rumination, one’s perception of self shifts, which can eventually cause serious mental and physical health issues. On today’s episode, Elisabeth and Jennifer discuss how toxic shame differs from regular shame, how toxic shame shows up, what happens in the body when it does, where toxic shame originates from, how shame and pleasure shows up in those with a history of childhood sexual abuse, and what you can do to recognize and repattern toxic shame with Neuro-Somatic Coaching.

Just as toxic shame is developed, it can be undeveloped, by learning how to recognize when and how it shows up in the body, then repatterning the neural pathways in real time using NSI tools, and allowing repressed emotions to mobilize. This episode is filled with knowledge and insight you don’t want to miss. Tune in for this and more! Topics discussed in this episode:

 

  • The difference between guilt and shame
  • Difference between regular shame and toxic shame
  • How toxic shame affects posture
  • How shame is a protective response
  • What is shame inflammation and its correlation to disease states?
  • Why mobilizing the body is crucial to process emotions
  • What is emotional attunement?
  • Overcoupling of shame and pleasure in the case of childhood sexual abuse
  • The types of body boundary violations
  • What to do if you are having a toxic shame response?
  • Why it’s important for practitioners to understand when a client is in a shame response
  • Repattering shame in real time

 

 

Contact us about private Rewire Neuro-Somatic Coaching: https://brainbased-wellness.com/rewire-private-neuro-somatic-coaching/

Learn more about the Neuro-Somatic Intelligence Coaching program and sign up for the spring cohort now! https://www.neurosomaticintelligence.com

 

Get started training your nervous system with our FREE 2-week offer on the Brain Based Membership site: https://www.rewiretrial.com

 

Connect with us on social media: @trauma.rewired

 

Join the Trauma Rewired Facebook Group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/761101225132846

 

FREE 1 Year Supply of Vitamin D + 5 Travel Packs from Athletic Greens when you use my exclusive offer: https://www.drinkag1.com/rewired

 

This episode was produced by Podcast Boutique https://www.podcastboutique.com

 

Trauma Rewired podcast  is intended to educate and inform but does not constitute medical, psychological or other professional advice or services. Always consult a qualified medical professional about your specific circumstances before making any decisions based on what you hear. 

We share our experiences, explore trauma, physical reactions, mental health and disease. If you become distressed by our content, please stop listening and seek professional support when needed. Do not continue to listen if the conversations are having a negative impact on your health and well-being. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, or in mental health crisis and you are in the United States you can 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.  If someone’s life is in danger, immediately call 911. 

We do our best to stay current in research, but older episodes are always available.  We don’t warrant or guarantee that this podcast contains complete, accurate or up-to-date information. It’s very important to talk to a medical professional about your individual needs, as we aren’t responsible for any actions you take based on the information you hear in this podcast.

We  invite guests onto the podcast. Please note that we don’t verify the accuracy of their statements. Our organization does not endorse third-party content and the views of our guests do not necessarily represent the views of our organization.

We talk about general neuro-science and nervous system health, but you are unique. These are conversations for a wide audience. They are general recommendations and you are always advised to seek personal care for your unique outputs, trauma and needs. 

We are not doctors or licensed medical professionals. We are certified neuro-somatic practitioners and nervous system health/embodiment coaches. We are not your doctor or medical professional and do not know you and your unique nervous system. This podcast is not a replacement for working with a professional.

The BrainBased.com site and Rewiretrail.com is a membership site for general nervous system health, somatic processing and stress processing. It is not a substitute for medical care or the appropriate solution for anyone in mental health crisis. 

Any examples mentioned in this podcast are for illustration purposes only. If they are based on real events, names have been changed to protect the identities of those involved. 

We’ve done our best to ensure our podcast respects the intellectual property rights of others, however if you have an issue with our content, please let us know by emailing us jennifer@traumarewired.com  All rights in our content are reserved

Up next
Oct 6
Trauma Isn't Just In Your Head (It's In Your Cells)
Trauma is not a single moment. It is an ongoing dialogue between your brain, body, and environment. In this conversation, Dr. Mbemba Jabbi explains how neuroplasticity and affective neuroscience help us understand protective patterns like hypervigilance, shutdown, and dissociatio ... Show More
1h 4m
Sep 29
The Emotional Block That No One Talks About
Have you ever drawn a blank when asked how you're feeling? Or maybe you experience constant inner buzzing, numbness, or anxiety without any words to describe it. You’re not broken—and you’re not alone. In this deeply informative and compassionately nuanced episode, Jennifer, Eliz ... Show More
39m 34s
Sep 22
The Duality of Emotions: Why Ambivalence Isn't Confusion
Ambivalence isn’t confusion or weakness, it’s your nervous system doing its job. Feeling both joy and grief, relief and loss, fear and excitement, is not dysfunction but survival wisdom. In this episode of Trauma Rewired, Elisabeth Kristof and Jennifer Wallace unpack ambivalence ... Show More
51m 13s
Recommended Episodes
Oct 3
Armoring - How Trauma Gets Embodied as Tension, Chronic Pain, Jumpiness or Emotional Walls
When we understand how trauma shows up in the body, armoring is an important aspect. It includes muscle tension, chronic pain, and constant hypervigilance. Learn the skills to regulate your Emotions, join the membership: https://courses.therapyinanutshell.com/membership FREE Grou ... Show More
19m 33s
Mar 2025
Treating Nervous System Dysregulation: Somatic Healing for CPTSD w/ Irene Lyon
Explore how a lifetime of chronic stress and fear can lead to nervous system dysregulation, and how somatic healing can help rewire our responses to trauma. Dive into this episode to uncover the transformative power of understanding and healing our deepest unseen wounds.Irene Lyo ... Show More
1h 13m
Jan 2023
The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health: What to Know and What to Do - a Put It into Practice Episode
In this week’s Put It into Practice episode I'm sharing how social media affects our mental health. And I'm also discussing what to do when we find ourselves dealing with anxiety and depression due to being on social media. Have a question about therapy, mental health or relation ... Show More
12m 9s
Jan 2024
How to Rewire Your Brain with Positive Self Talk with Lisa Mustard
In this episode I explore the transformative power of positive self-talk and its impact on mental health and emotional well-being. I dive into the nuances of nurturing a positive inner dialogue while cautioning against the pitfalls of toxic positivity. Before jumping into the mai ... Show More
12m 54s
Sep 2
327. How trauma gets trapped in the body
We often think of trauma as something extreme - a dramatic, life-altering event. But trauma isn’t just what happened to us. It’s also how our body learned to survive. It can be quiet, subtle, and long-lasting, shaping how we live, cope, and exist in the world, often unconsciously ... Show More
54m 6s
Apr 2025
The C’s
We share from How It Works.“We didn’t cause it.  We can’t control it.  We can’t cure it.”  But we can contribute compassion.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You ca ... Show More
21m 2s
Apr 2020
Book: Trauma and Recovery, Part Two
Dr. E shares about a book she discovered through a class with the ISSTD.  She explores what she has learned about Charcot, Janet, and Freud.  She gives the historical context of their rivalry, and how that later connected to research with veterans who had endured combat.  She tel ... Show More
55m 24s
Feb 2025
471: Coming Together After Trauma – With Dr. Thomas Hubl
Welcome back to Therapy Chat! Today I'm bringing you a replay episode with Dr. Thomas Hübl. We talked about his work over more than 2 decades working with groups of survivors of war, oppression, genocide and other collective traumas about how healing happens. This episode is part ... Show More
47m 1s
Sep 8
497: Finding The Authentic Therapist In You with Stefanie Klein
How can therapists learn to see countertransference as a gift, rather than a problem? This week's guest is Stefanie Klein, LCSW. Stefanie, an SEP and NARM Master Therapist, is the Assistant Training Director for the Complex Trauma Training Center where she is also a consultant an ... Show More
56m 25s
Oct 2024
Resolving Trauma to Step Into the Life Meant for You
In this episode, Sarah explains how trauma is something we all experience to varying degrees and the impact it has on our lives. When we have yet to resolve past trauma, it actually gets stuck and stored in our bodies, meaning our system essentially thinks it is still happening o ... Show More
1h 12m