logo
episode-header-image
Oct 2023
33m 59s

164. Why Venting Negative Emotions Only ...

OptimalWork
About this episode

#164: It’s a widespread belief that when experiencing negative emotions like anger or frustration, it’s helpful to vent them. In fact, this practice is counterproductive. Studies indicate that when people express negative emotions in this way, far from letting them out, they in fact get more of them. This result is confirmed by a consideration of the neuroscience of perception and appraisal. In this episode, we discuss the origin of the theory of catharsis, why it’s wrong, and what to do instead — and what to do if someone is venting to you.


Find more at https://OptimalWork.com

Up next
Sep 14
317. How a Good Decision Becomes an Action
#317: In this episode, Sharif and Kevin explore prudence as the virtue behind good decision-making — not simply knowing what to do, but discerning what truly serves the people entrusted to us and then putting that decision into action. Drawing on Augustine’s definition of prudenc ... Show More
34m 47s
Sep 7
[Rebroadcast] Professional Humility IV: Stonewalling
#316: Dr. John Gottman identifies four stages in the breakdown of a relationship: defensiveness, criticism, stonewalling, and ultimately contempt. Each of these reflects a deeper issue— a lack of humility. In this episode, we delve into the third stage: stonewalling. Stonewalling ... Show More
28m 52s
Aug 31
[Rebroadcast] Professional Humility III: Critical Spirit
#315: Dr. John Gottman identifies four stages in the breakdown of a relationship: defensiveness, criticism, stonewalling, and ultimately contempt. Each of these reflects a deeper issue— a lack of humility. In this episode, we delve into the second stage: criticism, or what we cal ... Show More
28m 35s
Recommended Episodes
Apr 2019
76. Anger + Something New
On a previous episode, I talked about the distinction between positive and negative motivation and action, and the way we're taught that negative emotions lead to positive actions. Many of us think our anger will motivate us to take actions, believing this will change things, but ... Show More
19m 49s
Feb 2020
Episode 43: Compound Misery
When we believe we shouldn't feel negative emotion, we add more negative feelings to our lives, compounding our misery and increasing our pain. The answer to this is to get good at feeling our negative emotion, instead of trying to resist it. The more we can allow our negative em ... Show More
34m 22s
Aug 2024
71. Processing and Releasing Resentment
<p> </p> <p>Let&#39;s explore another &quot;negative&quot; emotion... Resentment is a complex emotion &amp; can be triggered by feeling mistreated, being taken advantage of, or having unrealistic expectations. </p> <p>Unfortunately, it&#39;s pretty common for people pleasers and ... Show More
20m 41s
Mar 2009
Can anger be a good thing?
<p>Anger gets a bad rap, but this unpopular emotion can actually be beneficial to us. Tune in to this podcast from HowStuffWorks.com to get Josh and Chuck's entertaining take on why we lose our cool.</p><p> </p> Learn more about your ad-choices at <a href="https://www.iheartpodca ... Show More
19m 4s
Sep 2023
Revenge: Bitter, Not Sweet
Someone cuts you off in traffic or makes fun of your friend and all you can think of is how to get back at them and then some. But wait! Research has found that taking revenge actually makes you feel worse in the long run. Learn about what to do instead.See omnystudio.com/listene ... Show More
45m 48s
May 2022
Coaching Emotions: Anger: Episode 127
<p><b>Anger is a part of all of our lives. It has the potential to be a catalyst for change, an insight into our needs, and a source of wisdom. Yet too often it’s thought of as a “bad” emotion and avoided at all costs. </b></p><p><b>In this first episode of a three-part series on ... Show More
20m 23s
Oct 2025
102 | “Feelings Aren’t Facts” Is Harmful! Here’s Why You Need to Listen to Your Emotions
<p>You’ve probably heard the phrase “feelings aren’t facts” before. Maybe from a therapist, a friend, or even in a moment when someone was trying to help you calm down. But if you’re a highly sensitive or introverted woman, that phrase can actually do more harm than good. </p><p> ... Show More
14m 34s
Apr 2020
Why bad emotions are good
Many of us are witnessing a tyranny of positivity right now — with calls to “find the silver lining” and “stay positive” amidst a global pandemic. But we are wired to feel negative at times. Contrary to what our culture tells us, accepting our negative emotions can have tangible ... Show More
15m 50s