In this episode, I'm joined by Lauren Haas, an elementary student-support professional, educator, author, and doctoral student from Bend, Oregon, whose work helps children feel seen, safe, and supported. We dig into what emotional regulation really means and how our thoughts shape our emotional reactions, especially for kids who are still building that awareness. Lauren explains why co-regulation has to come before self-regulation, what "borrowing" a calm nervous system from a trusted adult looks like in a real classroom, and why common phrases like "calm down" or "use your words" can backfire in a hot moment. We also talk about how teachers can notice their own early warning signs and manage their own nervous systems when a student is escalating, how predictable routines and thoughtful classroom spaces set the stage for regulation, and why practicing skills during calm moments makes them available when things get hard. Lauren shares what regulation support can look like for nonspeaking students and learners with more complex needs, and why the repair after a blow-up matters just as much as any strategy. You can find more from Lauren on Instagram at @thecognitivecounselor.
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