Do you write 3 paragraphs when "no" would be enough?
Do you feel guilty for hours after setting one small boundary?
You don't have a communication problem. You have a trauma response called over-explaining. And in this episode, I'm breaking down exactly where it comes from and how to stop.
Over-explaining is what happens when you were raised to believe that your "no" wasn't enough. That you had to JUSTIFY your feelings to be taken seriously. That if you just explained BETTER, he would finally understand you.
He understood you. He just didn't care. And your 10-paragraph explanation won't make him care.
Wholeness looks better than desperation and whole women don't explain. They state.
If this episode makes you feel seen, share it with the friend who also sends voice note essays.
She needs this.