Questions answered this episode:
- Last year, I broke up with my boyfriend of three years, whom I really believed I was going to marry. One of our struggles was his porn addiction, which sadly led him to abuse his sister. Devastated, I chose to forgive and love him, reasoning that if God forgives us, I should do the same. He even introduced me to TOB. But now I wonder: how can he and his sister heal when she acts like he doesn't exist? How can TOB apply here? I'm angry because I was willing to carry this cross with him, but he didn't fight for us.
- I went to high school with a woman who I became friends with senior year. At no point in high school were we ever interested in the other. After high school I went to seminary for two years before discerning to leave seminary. I left about 10 months ago, and about one month ago started dating this woman from high school. We both value our friendship, have similar goals and dreams for the future, and take our faith very seriously. I asked her out to see if God could be doing something here, and we're giving it time to see if physical attraction for each other grows through the process. Before asking her out, I found a lot of fear in wondering what others, especially friends from high school who really aren't true friends, would think. Do you have any advice for me?
- I struggle with feeling like I need to look "physically perfect" in order for a man to like me and to want to enter into a relationship with me. Part of this comes from messages that I've received from my parents since a young age, such as receiving comments when something is out of place or pointing out when something is less than desirable, such as a pimple on my face. In addition to hearing negative comments about other people's weight and physical appearance, a big part of it also stems from hearing that men are more influenced by the physical than women are. Now that I'm pushing 30 and I'm getting more gray hairs, I'm left feeling like no man will desire me now and enter into a relationship with me. On the flip side, I also feel at a loss since there have been men in my life who seek me out for my physical appearance, but then lose interest once they get to know me, leaving me feeling like my personality is lacking. As I age, I'm left feeling like I will have nothing left to attract the husband I so desire, even though some part of me knows cognitively that's not true. Do you have any insight or advice about this from a TOB perspective?
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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
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