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Behavior charts. Consequence ladders. ABC data.
They’re everywhere- and school counselors are often expected to be in the middle of it.
But what happens when the behaviorist framework you're handed feels completely misaligned with your counseling instincts?
What if you’re tired of being the “behavior person” when all you want is to help kids feel safe and understood?
In this episode, I'm naming the tension between behaviorism and trauma-informed care, and why school counselors are so often stuck in the middle. We’ll explore how to hold both structure and compassion… and how to begin stepping back into the role that actually reflects your training.
If you’ve ever felt caught between compliance and connection, this one’s for you.
[00:00] Why behavior plans feel off for counselors
[03:00] Behaviorism basics (and why it still dominates)
[06:45] Trauma-informed care: the “can’t,” not “won’t” lens
[10:00] Can you hold structure and compassion?
[14:00] Real-life examples: escape and attention-seeking
[16:30] The problem isn’t just strategy—it’s your role
[17:30] Three frameworks that actually work
[20:00] How to stop being “the behavior person”
[24:00] Four ways to shift the narrative
[27:00] Final encouragement + your next step
References
Barth, R. P., Lee, B. R., Lindsey, M. A., Collins, K. S., Strieder, F. H., Chorpita, B. F., Becker, K. D., & Snowden, L. R. (2004). Evidence-based practice in mental health services for youth. The Journal of Behavioral Health Services & Research, 31(2), 213–233. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF02287377
Berger, E., Green, S., & Dalton, L. (2019). Educator perceptions of trauma-informed care in schools: A qualitative study. School Mental Health, 11(3), 483–496. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12310-019-09323-z
Blaustein, M., & Kinniburgh, K. (2010). Treating traumatic stress in children and adolescents: How to foster resilience through attachment, self-regulation, and competency. Guilford Press.
Greene, R. W., Ablon, J. S., & Goring, J. C. (2003). A transactional model of oppositional behavior: Underpinnings of the Collaborative Problem Solving approach. Journal of Psychosocial Nursing and Mental Health Services, 41(11), 20–25. https://doi.org/10.3928/0279-3695-20031101-08
Overstreet, S., & Chafouleas, S. M. (2016). Trauma-informed schools: Introduction to the special issue. School Mental Health, 8(1), 1–6. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12310-016-9184-1
Perry, B. D. (2006). Fear and learning: Trauma-related factors in the adult education process. In S. Johnson & K. Taylor (Eds.), The Neuroscience of Learning and Development (pp. 123–142). Jossey-Bass.
Perry, B. D., & Szalavitz, M. (2017). The boy who was raised as a dog: And other stories from a child psychiatrist’s notebook (3rd ed.). Basic Books.
The National Child Traumatic Stress Network. (n.d.). Trauma-Informed School Strategies During COVID-19. https://www.nctsn.org/resources/trauma-informed-school-strategies-during-covid-19
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Our goal at School for School Counselors is to help school counselors stay on fire, make huge impacts for students, and catalyze change for our roles through grassroots advocacy and collaboration. Listen to get to know more about us and our mission, feel empowered and inspired, and set yourself up for success in the wonderful world of school counseling.