logo
episode-header-image
Feb 2025
51m 15s

We Need to Talk

Hidden Brain, Shankar Vedantam
About this episode

Just because we’ve been doing something for a long time doesn’t mean we’re doing it right. One part of our lives where this may be particularly true is when we're talking with others. This week, we bring you the first of a two-part look at what makes someone skilled at socializing. Behavioral scientist Alison Wood Brooks explains why conversations are much more complex than most of us realize — and how to engage in a more meaningful back-and-forth with another person.

For more of our work on the art of conversation, check out these classic Hidden Brain episodes: 

Why Conversations Go Wrong

Relationships 2.0: How to Keep Conflict from Spiraling

 

 

Up next
Jul 7
You 2.0: The Passion Pill
You’ve probably heard the saying, “Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.” The idea is that pursuing your passion will feel invigorating — almost magical. But passions can easily wane over time. This week, behavioral scientist Jon Jachimowicz looks at how to ... Show More
49m 25s
Jun 30
You 2.0: What Is Your Life For?
What should you do with your life? There's no one-size-fits-all answer to that question. But there are scientifically-tested methods that can help you to feel more in harmony with yourself and the world. This week, and in a companion conversation for Hidden Brain+, researcher Vic ... Show More
1h 3m
Jun 23
Win Hearts, Then Minds + Your Questions Answered on Identity and "Covering"
There’s a saying that’s attributed to the Dalai Lama: in the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher. It’s a nice idea. But when people don’t share our values, it’s hard for us to tolerate theirs. This week, we bring you a favorite episode with sociologist Robb Wil ... Show More
1h 25m
Recommended Episodes
Aug 2024
Encore - How to have great conversations, with Charles Duhigg and Michael Yeomans, PhD
Conversational chemistry might seem intangible, but psychologists are beginning figure out what makes some conversations work while others fall apart. Charles Duhigg, author of the upcoming book Supercommunicators and conversation researcher Michael Yeomans, PhD, talk about how a ... Show More
51m 32s
Nov 2024
169. Don't Be a ZQ: Make Your Conversations Count
​​ What makes a great conversation? “Many of us dread small talk,” says Harvard Business School professor and author Alison Wood Brooks. Yet she believes these everyday exchanges are the gateway to deeper connection and opportunity. An expert in the science of conversation, Wood ... Show More
24m 50s
Feb 2025
How to Master Small Talk & Why We Do Things Without Knowing Why- SYSK Choice
Is there a reason we have eyebrows? Pretty much every part of the human body has a reason for being there and eyebrows actually have three reasons. I begin this episode by explaining what they are. https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/58424/why-do-we-have-eyebrows Every relationsh ... Show More
49m 35s
Jan 2025
The science of better workplace conversations
What can we learn about the way we speak by analysing thousands of everyday conversations? That’s a question that fascinates Alison Wood Brooks. Alison, an associate professor at Harvard Business School, and author of the forthcoming book, Talk: The Science of Conversation and th ... Show More
17m 41s
Mar 2025
The Keys to Great Conversation
Whether we’re interacting with colleagues, clients, friends, family members or strangers, conversations are the way most of us build — or break — relationships. And yet we don’t often think deeply about how to approach this type of casual communication.  Alison Wood Brooks, assoc ... Show More
32m 19s
Jan 2025
Why We Like Cute Things & How to Have a Great Conversation
When you use sarcasm in an email or text message, you are skating on thin ice. This episode begins by revealing the dangers of sarcasm in electronic communication and why it can get you in trouble. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perceptual-asymmetries/201501/do-you-use-s ... Show More
53m 15s
Feb 2025
Alison Wood Brooks (on the science of conversation)
Alison Wood Brooks (Talk: The Science of Conversation and the Art of Being Ourselves) is a behavioral research scientist. Alison joins the Armchair Expert to discuss why growing up as a twin is like watching an alternate version of your own life, how we underestimate the complexi ... Show More
2h 8m
Jan 2025
What you can learn from people who disagree with you | Shreya Joshi
This week, we're revisiting an episode with youth leader Shreya Joshi, who shows why having "uncomfortable conversations" with people you disagree with is crucial to bridging the political divide. "When we are able to recognize what unites us, it becomes so much easier to have co ... Show More
15m 38s
May 2023
52. Top 6 ‘Best of’ episodes: How to NOT be boring
We’ve hit the middle of Season 7 and we’re continuing to explore our 6 most listened-to episodes. Each episode has a new introduction in which Jen and Michael reflect on why the topic resonated so much with our listeners and what we’ve learned about the topic in the interim. Comi ... Show More
31m 8s
Feb 2025
Why We’re Wired to Imitate Others & How to Have a Great Conversation
You probably think raw vegetables are healthier than cooked vegetables. Sometimes they are. But some common veggies get a nutrient boost from the right kind of heat. This episode begins with several of those vegetables and an explanation of how cooking makes them better for you. ... Show More
51m 22s