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There's a saying, 'It's not the thing; it's the thing behind the thing.' Have you ever noticed that in your life, it's not that you procrastinate, but rather the fear of it going wrong causes you to put things off? It's not that you're scared of relationships, but you're scared to get your heart ripped out. We call that 'the thing behind the thing,' and in this video, we're diving deep into the stories you tell yourself.
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Hey there, I’m Clark Kegley, a former pro drummer turned self-improvement advocate. Here on YouTube, I provide guidance to help you transform into your 2.0 version.
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Video of Neurons Connecting courtesy of Dr Lila Landowski:
© Lila Maree Landowski [originally published online 14/11/2019; video generated in 2010]
VIDEO PREVIEW
I can't emphasize enough how important this subject is. Once you see how it's affecting you, we'll discuss a 'film strip' of your life. We're also going to explore core stories and where they come from. Most people are running on three or four core stories, and that's it. These stories are literally controlling your entire life. I'll even pose a question or two on how you can address these issues.
We often hear about the need to fix your limiting beliefs. It's all a mindset game, right? Here's why that perspective is flawed: you work in three layers—your thoughts, emotions, and core stories. Thoughts are on the outside, what we'll call beliefs. If you believe in yourself enough, you might take actions to build your business. If you have better thoughts, then you might feel successful or content. But it's not the thing; it's the thing behind the thing. What's behind thoughts? Emotions.
Take driving, for example. When you're in a bad emotional state, your thoughts and actions change based on that emotion. Your thoughts are like files on a computer, and your emotions are the folders they're stored in. Change your emotion, and you'll notice your thinking changes as well.
But there's one more layer, and that's what this whole video is about. What do you think this first layer is? It's your core story, also known as your identity or self-image. This is the most crucial element. Why does rewiring limiting beliefs often feel ineffective? Why does positive thinking feel so hard when we're in a low vibe? It's because most people try to change from the outside in, from layers three to one. But the fastest way you can change your entire identity and your life is to go from the inside out, from level one to three. When you change your story, your emotions and thoughts change too.
Before we dive deeper into these concepts, let's briefly touch on what I mean by 'stories.' Since the dawn of humanity, information has been passed down through stories. This is literally how our brains evolved to store information—not with just ones and zeros like a computer, not with just linear thinking or absolute fact and logic. These are all tools, but we developed through passing down stories orally before written language. It was passed down around a campfire. Think of the last movie you watched. You probably can't recount every factual event that happened, but you can summarize the plot because that's what genuinely happens.
In your life, have you ever questioned the story you're telling yourself about you? Let's continue exploring how your brain works because this is very important. Are you getting this? I hope this is making sense. You're essentially right here.
Refusing to settle,
Clark