logo
episode-header-image
Jul 2024
1h 17m

Melinda Gates: Why Your Perfectionism Ha...

iHeartPodcasts
About this episode

Are you a perfectionist? 

Do you ever spend time alone in silence? 

Today, Jay sits down with Melinda French Gates, co-chair of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation and founder of Pivotal Ventures to talk about her journey from studying computer science at Duke University to working at Microsoft, and eventually transitioning into philanthropy.

Melinda highlights the importance of goal setting and quiet reflection, practices instilled in her from a young age; the challenges women and people of color face in achieving equality, emphasizing the need for more inclusive policies and support systems; and the importance of diverse representation in leadership and decision-making roles.

Melinda shared insights into her parenting approach, emphasizing the importance of instilling values of kindness, responsibility, and giving back to society. She also shared her journey of grappling with the decision to publicly support contraceptive access, which conflicted with her Catholic faith. This decision involved deep reflection, discussions with family and friends, and a significant amount of time spent questioning and reconciling her beliefs. 

Later in the conversation, Melinda highlighted several key lessons she learned later in life, such as the realization that the world is not equally accessible to everyone, particularly women and people of color. This understanding fueled her advocacy for creating more inclusive environments and breaking down barriers that prevent these groups from reaching their full potential​. 

In this interview, you'll learn:

How to embrace change positively

How to spend time alone 

How to set and achieve goals

How to overcome imposter syndrome

How to teach children the value of service

How to build a culture of giving

How to foster kindness and gratitude

Take a moment to reflect, give yourself grace, and celebrate your authentic self. Let’s grow together, one imperfect step at a time.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

What We Discuss:

  • 00:00 Intro
  • 02:58 Takeaways From Dealing with Change
  • 04:26 Positive Mindset on Change
  • 06:54 Where Did Your Dream Start?
  • 10:18 Spending Time in Silence
  • 12:11 Cultivate Relationships with Trusted People
  • 14:12 Lessons Learned as a Parent
  • 16:05 Not Everyone is Given the Same Opportunity
  • 18:20 Equality for All in the Community
  • 20:24 The Demand of Contraceptives Worldwide
  • 24:41 The Imposter Syndrome
  • 27:20 The Beauty in the Imperfections
  • 30:01 Spiritual Group of Different Religions
  • 33:36 Wisdom from Different Age Group
  • 34:59 Addiction to Perfection
  • 37:05 Stop Judging Yourself and Others
  • 40:56 Equating Grace to Guilt
  • 42:53 Finding Grace After Divorce
  • 46:48 Be Kind to Yourself While Processing Pain
  • 48:36 You Will Find Happiness Again
  • 51:13 Empowering Women and People of Color
  • 54:12 Breaking Down Biased Excuses
  • 59:29 Kindness, Talent, and Luck
  • 01:00:54 Children of Famous Parents
  • 01:04:24 Creating a Culture of Giving
  • 01:12:45 Melinda on Final Five  

Episode Resources:

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Up next
Aug 22
7 Money Lessons I Wish Knew in My 20s! (The Step-by-Step Guide to Build Financial Freedom Faster)
Did anyone ever teach you about money when you were younger? What’s one money mistake you made in your 20s? Today, Jay shares the financial lessons he wishes he knew in his twenties. Insights that don’t just change how you handle money, but how you understand it. Jay reveals that ... Show More
28m 33s
Aug 20
Big Sean: Stop Wishing & Start Manifesting (THIS is the Secret Formula to Making Your Dreams a REALITY)
What’s one dream you really want to make real? Do you feel you’re wishing for it or working toward it? In this special live recording from The Met in Philadelphia, Jay sits down with Grammy-nominated artist Big Sean for a deeply vulnerable and inspiring conversation. Big Sean ope ... Show More
53m 47s
Aug 18
Mark Hyman: Struggling With Brain Fog, Weight Gain, and Low Energy? It’s Likely Hidden Inflammation! (Do THIS to Reverse It)
Do you struggle to focus on simple tasks? Do you feel mentally “slowed down” during the day? Today, Jay welcomes back his dear friend and trailblazer in functional medicine, Dr. Mark Hyman. Mark Hyman, MD is the co-founder and Chief Medical Officer of Function Health, the fastest ... Show More
1h 10m
Recommended Episodes
Apr 2025
Melinda French Gates on The Next Day and the Beauty in What Comes Next
Description: If we’re lucky, most of us will live an abundant life that’s filled with a number of significant transitions. How we embrace those inevitable life changes and honor that growth can make a big difference in how we are prepared to meet future challenges. Today, Jen and ... Show More
51m 56s
Jul 2
Melinda French Gates - ‘Just because you’re smart doesn’t mean you’re wise’
Melinda French Gates studied computer science and economics and completed an MBA before joining a tech start-up called Microsoft, in 1987. She rose through the ranks to become Manager of Information Products and married the boss in 1994. His name was Bill Gates. Together, the cou ... Show More
50m 25s
Apr 2025
Stop Waiting. Start Living. Why You Feel Stuck - And How to Break Free and Reinvent Your Life | Natalie MacNeil (Fan Fav)
Lisa Bilyeu sits down with Emmy Award–winning entrepreneur, author, and creator of She Takes on the World, Natalie MacNeil. From launching her first company at just 21 to becoming a guiding force for women ready to embrace their full selves in business, Natalie shares her candid ... Show More
51m 9s
Apr 2025
Find Your Allies Fast with philanthropist Melinda French Gates
Change happens to all of us whether we choose it or not. What’s the best way to go through transition, especially when it’s something we didn’t want?Melinda French Gates has seen her fair share of big transitions. A philanthropist, author, and champion for female empowerment, she ... Show More
38m 35s
Jul 10
Work in Progress: Melinda French Gates
Changes are a part of life, and sharing one's experiences can help others navigate their life transitions. That's what philanthropist, businesswoman, and advocate for gender equality, Melinda French Gates, is hoping to do with her new memoir, "The Next Day."Get ready for a deeply ... Show More
1h 2m
Sep 2024
Ep 262 Meet Stylist Jessica Papineau!
Have you ever wondered why so many women struggle to find lasting fulfillment, even when they seem to be doing everything right? Despite investing in themselves and their careers, many still feel disconnected, stuck, or afraid to fully embrace their desires. They’ve been conditio ... Show More
1h 15m
Mar 2025
Jay Shetty: Why You Keep Settling for Less—And How to Finally Break Free | PT 1
In this enlightening episode of "Women of Impact," host Lisa Bilyeu welcomes the insightful and compassionate Jay Shetty, a former monk turned influential author and speaker. They delve into the powerful yet often challenging topic of self-worth, exploring why so many women settl ... Show More
54m 50s
Mar 2024
#301 - WOMEN WHO MAKE AN IMPACT SERIES: Your Work’s Impact On YOU with Dr. Laura Brenner
In today's episode in the WOMEN WHO MAKE AN IMPACT SERIES, Dr. Tarryn McCarthy sits down with the remarkable Dr. Laura Brenner, a former dentist turned influencer in personal growth and professional fulfillment. The discussion centers around pursuing lifelong dreams, whether ... Show More
40m 8s
Dec 2024
2024 GREATS: 925: How to Stop People-Pleasing and Feeling Guilty with Dr. Aziz Gazipura
Dr. Aziz Gazipura explains the dangers of people-pleasing tendencies and shares actionable steps for overcoming it.  — YOU’LL LEARN — 1) The massive costs of being a people-pleaser2) How to not feel guilty when saying no3) A surprising strategy to build your discomfort tolerance  ... Show More
44m 18s
Nov 2024
Yara Shahidi Opens Up: How To Prioritize Mental Health & Overcome Self-Doubt To Achieve Any Dream
Join me for an incredibly insightful conversation with the remarkable Yara Shahidi, who at just 24 has already achieved extraordinary success as an actress, producer, and Harvard graduate. Beyond her achievements on shows like Black-ish and Grown-ish, Yara reveals herself as a de ... Show More
1h 26m