This coaching call is about learning to trust others. Today's caller, Samantha, was bullied as a child and finds it difficult to trust others enough to make new friends. She asks for guidance on expanding her circle of friends and allowing herself to be truly seen by others.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode432].
We can get a thousand compliments, and a thousand great things can happen but we always seem to remember the one yucky thing someone said or did. And, often, it can be much stronger than yucky. It can be downright traumatic. Being bullied, not feeling like you fit in, and not feeling that you can trust people are very traumatic because they push against our need for belonging, which is a safety and survival need.
If you have a hard time trusting people, really the person you don't trust is yourself.
If you are looking at something in your life that feels like a big problem or block, look to where the beliefs or behaviors have served you. Consider how you can reframe it. Choose wisely or pay attention to your intuition if something comes up. Or, if someone betrays you, stand up for yourself. Stand up to a bully. Get honest with yourself, and stop playing the victim.
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Consider/Ask Yourself:
Would you like to have more people in your life but you just don't trust people?
Are you expecting people to hurt you and find it hard to trust others?
Was there an early-life event that shaped the way you make friendships and let people in?
Samantha's Question:
Samantha struggles to trust people and would like guidance on how to be more open to expanding her inner circle.
Samantha's Key Insights and Ahas:
She was bullied as a young girl.
She doesn't trust people immediately.
She wants to be open to additional friendships.
People don't seem safe to her.
She feels people are out to get her.
She feels blocked from making new friends.
She wants to protect herself and be free.
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Learn to trust herself.
Reframe what she tells herself.
Challenge her existing beliefs.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
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