logo
episode-header-image
Jul 2023
23m 38s

486: ASoS Davos IV

Close The Door And Come Here
About this episode
Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Davos is out of prison. Did Stannis even know he was in there??? Stannis is drained...in so many ways. Davos becomes Hand and offers Stannis his tongue—more on that at eleven. Kill Bill sirens go off when Melisandre enters but Davos is just “happy” to be here. Burning leeches in lieu of burning children feels like the b ... Show More
Up next
Jul 8
590: ADwD The Merchant's Man
Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Quentyn’s having a rough journey through Dance, and so are we tbqh. Dany's living in the worst episode of The Bachelor and she doesn't even know it. Never trust anyone who sets up a recruiting table. We struggle with the decades old question ... Show More
23m 24s
Jul 1
589: ADwD Tyrion II
Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's yet another hellish road trip, this time with Tyrion and Illyrio. Illyrio proves he is the king of "yes, and?" when it comes to grossness. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 5 ... Show More
34m 51s
Jun 24
588: ADwD Bran I
Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Bran and co. are on their way to meet the three-eyed crow in what sounds like The Donner Party, Westerosi style. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Bran I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 588 
33m 29s
Recommended Episodes
Jul 2013
ASoS 3: Valyria's Gynysss Book of World Records
Davos I and Sansa I are all Ivan and Red could make it through in this action packed episode. Get Ivan as the Bassy sensual e-trade baby #BassyBaby, learn the true meaning of sputum, listen to Ivan and Red give Sansa the benefit of the doubt, Davos inventing Men's Rights Activism ... Show More
1h 23m
Aug 2014
ASoS 34: Petyr Baelish’s Game of King Chairs
Jaime reminds The Kingsguard who’s in charge and Petyr Baelish gets showy with his mastery of The Game of Thrones in Jaime VIII (Hardback page 750/Paperback page 912) in George R.R. Martin’s “A Storm of Swords”. Ivan and Red discuss Ravens from the Bannermen, books vs toilet pape ... Show More
1h 16m
Oct 2011
Book 4: Catelyn Gives a Shit
Ivan & Red cover pages 93-127, AKA Jon, Daenerys, Ned, and Tyrion. Shout out to Lydia spoiling a major character death for us. Catelyn shits in inappropriate places, Jon & Tyrion head off to the wall. Eddard Bros out with the Robert. Send us comments, questions, or feedback at @b ... Show More
1h 1m
Apr 2019
8x01: 600 Days of Winter
Winterfell, Season 8, Episode 1 of Game of Thrones. Ivan & Red discuss the stage being set for the final showdown between the dead and the living. From Jon missing the point, to Sansa being taken seriously, to Arya making a dagger gun, it’s a giant of an episode, so cuddle up nex ... Show More
1h 16m
May 2019
S8E5 Recap
Dany has snapped. Arya is on a horse. Jon has a Mad Queen. Tyrion stans a crazy woman. Varys is dead. Holy shit. Episode 5 recap after one of the craziest (and most polarizing) episodes of television ever. 
1 h
Apr 2015
Game of Thrones: "High Sparrow" - Dragons on the Wall
In the new (and newly titled!) Dragons on the Wall, we discuss all of the big events this week, including Cersei's power struggle and Arya's training. We aldo chat about Jon Snow's choice vs. Dany's the week before, plus what we think about a notable change for Sansa from the boo ... Show More
40m 26s
Sep 2012
Clash 13: Empire Strikes Back it is Not
Catelyn IV, Jon IV, Bran V, and Tyrion VIII. Ivan and Red cover the barrage of Tyrion, the importance of candles, excessively specific gods, Jon following Lassie to the well, Jojen's worthlessly ambiguous dreams, and Lannister compliments being the sinister sound of your inevitab ... Show More
1h 6m
Jul 2017
7x01: Stannis’s Poor Dead Soldiers
It’s HBO’s Season 7 Game of Thrones premiere, “Dragonstone”, and Ivan and Red are back and eager to revisit the Winterfell Crew, the Narrow Sea Crew, The Wall, King’s Landing, and even a few stragglers. Support Ivan & Red!->patreon.com/boarsgoreswords Check out Ivan & Red’s polit ... Show More
1h 37m
Jan 2012
Book 18: Yep, Your Dad Will Be Back Any Minute
Ivan and Red cover Daenerys, Arya, and Bran (702-740). They talk about Jorah's poor fashion sense, Arya going Oliver Twist, Bran noting people don't fight very well, Bran suggesting a two man Power Ranger-like assemblage of himself and Hodor, and The Kings of Winter. Next week we ... Show More
1h 12m
May 2019
S8E4 Recap
We've finished the great war, now it's time for the last war. Will Dany kill those civilians? Was Brienne better off without a man? Is Gendry the least aware human being of all-time? Has anyone ever handled Dragons worse? Are we about to see the Mad Queen?  
1h 9m