logo
episode-header-image
Jul 2021
20m 55s

Loving Across Borders

The New York Times
About this episode

At age 11, Julissa Arce came to the United States from Mexico on a visa that expired three years later. For more than a decade, she lived as an undocumented immigrant, fearful of revealing her secret to anyone. “Every phone call or email I got from human resources would make my blood run cold,” she wrote in her Modern Love essay. And when it came to love, she would lie to nearly every man she dated, fearing the threat of exposure and deportation.

On today’s episode, we hear about an undocumented immigrant’s search for love — and what it taught her about isolation and intimacy. Then, we hear from two Modern Love listeners who have kept their long-distance relationships alive during the pandemic. 

Up next
Jul 9
Let Mel Robbins Share Her 5 Tips for a Healthy Relationship
The best-selling author and motivational podcast host Mel Robbins is known for her blunt advice and viral wisdom, from The 5-Second Rule to countless proverbs on relationships, confidence and everyday stuck-ness. Her most recent book, “The Let Them Theory,” has given her readers ... Show More
50m 21s
Jul 2
‘The Interview’: Ocean Vuong was Ready to Kill. Then a Moment of Grace Changed His Life.
This week on Modern Love, we’re bringing you a conversation we liked so much that we’re envious we didn’t get to have ourselves. In a raw but deeply heartfelt and compassionate conversation with “The Interview" host David Marchese, author and poet Ocean Vuong talks about the real ... Show More
50m 52s
Jun 25
To Share or Not to Share? How Location Sharing Is Changing Our Relationships
When we asked Modern Love listeners how location sharing is affecting their relationships, the responses we got were all over the map. Some people love this technology. Some hate it. But either way, it has changed something fundamental about how we demonstrate our love and how we ... Show More
32m 54s
Recommended Episodes
Nov 2019
What's really happening at the US-Mexico border -- and how we can do better | Erika Pinheiro
At the US-Mexico border, policies of prolonged detention and family separation have made seeking asylum in the United States difficult and dangerous. In this raw and heartfelt talk, immigration attorney Erika Pinheiro offers a glimpse into her daily work on both sides of the bord ... Show More
14m 5s
Oct 2020
Kind World Presents: Port Of Entry
The perception that the U.S.-Mexico border’s been effectively sealed shut because of the pandemic is wrong. Lots of people are still crossing. Actually, the biggest, most dramatic change in who can’t cross right now; you’re not going to find those folks at the official ports of e ... Show More
25m 21s
Oct 2021
Love and Romance
LOVE & ROMANCE – Laurie Taylor unpacks different conceptions of love. He’s joined by Raksha Pande, Senior Lecturer in Social Geography at Newcastle University, whose latest research explores arranged marriages amongst people in the British-Indian diaspora. She finds that they hav ... Show More
28m 54s
Jun 2019
What It’s Really Like to be a Border Patrol Wife
Ashley DiBella is so proud of her husband Juan and his work. She wishes she could sing it from the rooftops, but she can’t because a lot of people have very strong opinions about what Juan does. Now Ashley wants to set the record straight about what it’s really like to be married ... Show More
29m 13s
Sep 2023
Gilberto Rosas, "Unsettling: The El Paso Massacre, Resurgent White Nationalism, and the US-Mexico Border" (Johns Hopkins UP, 2023)
On August 3, 2019, a far-right extremist committed a deadly mass shooting at a major shopping center in El Paso, Texas, a city on the border of the United States and Mexico. In Unsettling, Gilberto Rosas situates this devastating shooting as the latest unsettling consequence of o ... Show More
44m 48s
Oct 2023
We Found Love, Part 1: I Met My Husband in Prison
The first chapter of “We Found Love,” a three-part miniseries exploring how romantic love and partnership run up against – and sometimes transcend – the criminal justice system. Through the stories of three couples, at all different stages in their relationships, Boston Globe rep ... Show More
40m 37s
Apr 2021
Allison B. Wolf, "Just Immigration in the Americas: A Feminist Account" (Rowman & Littlefield, 2020)
Allison B. Wolf's Just Immigration in the Americas: A Feminist Account (Rowman and Littlefield, 2020) proposes a pioneering, interdisciplinary, feminist approach to immigration justice, which defines immigration justice as being about identifying and resisting global oppression i ... Show More
1h 15m
Sep 2023
The life and times of Lalo García: Immigration, deportation, reconciliation
Journalist Laura Tillman phoned Máximo Bistrot, a restaurant riding the wave of Mexico City's popularity as a fine dining destination, in hopes of interviewing its chef, Eduardo "Lalo" García Guzmán. Tillman had covered immigration for the past 10 years and she was interested in ... Show More
59m 50s
Mar 2021
Diane Guerrero
Actor, author, and activist Diane Guerrero joins Jameela this week to discuss the Diane's experience as the daughter of immigrants, having her parents deported when she was 14, how EMDR helped her heal from her trauma, why she speaks out for her community, and what needs to chang ... Show More
1h 5m
Oct 2019
A personal plea for humanity at the US-Mexico border | Juan Enriquez
In this powerful, personal talk, author and academic Juan Enriquez shares stories from inside the immigration crisis at the US-Mexico border, bringing this often-abstract debate back down to earth -- and showing what you can do every day to create a sense of belonging for immigra ... Show More
10m 17s